Tag Archives: april fool’s day

Unicorn Meat: An Alternative Source of Protein and Magic

And now back to our usual scheduled programming. I’m really trying to bulk up my muscles for the summer. Gotta look good in my mankini! I just get so sick of the same old protein sources every single day. Chicken, eggs, more chicken, even more eggs. Don’t get me wrong, I’m a man who loves his eggs, but mostly when ...

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The Needle and the Damage Done: How to Combat Knitter’s Block

It happens even to the finest of us crafters. One day you’ll be on a roll, knitting a scarf for your daughter in only a few hours, whipping out a quick pair of socks for your son-in-law’s birthday. And in the next moment, disaster strikes – it’s knitter’s block, and it’s here to stay. But don’t go switching on that ...

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Incognito Iris Goes Undercover on the Internet’s Chatroulette Website

Our very own knitting queen Incognito Iris went undercover on the Internet’s Chatroulette.com webpage. Disguised as an everyday teenaged girl, Iris took to the “world wide web” to investigate what the allure of the Internet is to the youth of the world, the future generation of Gearfuse Knitting Circle members! As you can see from the above photograph, the youngin’ ...

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Gearfuse Knitting Circle to Integrate “Cellular Telephone” Technology

All of this talk about technology and the “cellular telephone” might seem scary at first, but the Gearfuse Knitting Circle is dedicated to providing our members with the finest in cutting edge knitting technology. So what is all of this talk about this newfangled mobile telephone device? Many of your grandchildren might already be using one! Starting in 2011, the ...

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We Surprised Janice With a New Set of Knitting Supplies!

As you might already know, the Gearfuse Knitting Circle has been surprising one lucky member monthly with a complete new set of premium knitting supplies and sundries. This month’s lucky winner was none other than Janice Clovefield! Congratulations Janice! We hope you enjoy your new goodies! Could next month’s winner be you?

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Gearfuse Knitting Circle Newsletter #34, Vol. 2

The Gearfuse KnittingCircleis proud to welcome a new member to our renowned crafting community. Welcome Doris Hendrickson. We’re all looking forward to your future projects,particularlythose darling booties you’re making for little Jeffy! News from the Needle Mrs.MargeryWashburn won third prize at the annual Fleming Quilting Society meet for her cutting-edge and innovative quilting patterns. Mr. Washburn congratulated her with a ...

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TV Poltergeist Fools Your Friends Into Fear

April Fools’ Day is right around the corner, which means it’s time to get nasty. It’s time to get mean. It’s time to get ruthless. And feel totally not guilty about it at all. TV Poltergeist is a little device that you can hide in your living room that will automatically turn the power to the TV off and on ...

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RIM Ditching Smartphones; Introduces BlackBerry Yogurt

In a sudden and shocking move by one of the leading mobility companies in the world, RIM has announced that they will be discontinuing all of their interests in the smartphone sector and will be focusing all of their efforts on their newest product, BlackBerry Yogurt. “The recession has put a considerable strain on the fledgling mobile industry, and competing ...

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Washboard Hero Planned For Late-Spring

I don’t think there is a doubt in anybody’s mind that this is going to be a gigantic hit. Harmonix has announced their brand new take on the music-themed video game genre, now with a Confederate twist. Washboard Hero will feature such bluegrass classics as “Home, Home on the Homestead”, “O Me O My O Me”, and the irresistible “Possum ...

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Gearfuse.com Becomes Premiere Parkour Destination

Gearfuse.com, one of the finest websites on the Internet, will now become a parkour-focused website. The move will enable Gearfuse to post more YouTube clips of Frenchmen jumping across buildings than ever before. Publisher Steve Rufer said that he is “grateful we could make this kind of switch. I recently moved to Paris and can’t stop jumping over women and ...

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