Gearfuse

I knew Optimus could transform into some groovy vehicles and even become a peripheral or cool tool every once in a while, but I had no idea that he was in the home entertainment biz as well. The Optimus Prime USB Speaker Set is a three-pound faux Transformer robotic head, with a helme which folds out to be a pair of speakers.

Word on the street is that there will also be an Ultra Magnus version. But why bother when the Opt-man is available anyway? Now, I can’t guarantee an audiophile listening experience (in all honestly, the speakers look sorta shoddy), I can very well affirm that you’ll probably be the only guy on the block listening to J-pop through the ears of a geek culture icon.

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Basketball can be fun when you’re with a couple of friends. Just the guys, chilling back and shooting a few hoops. But how do you get pumped before a game? Perhaps you listen to music on your iPod, like Michael Phelps does. Or, maybe you’re more of a Twitterer, like Shaq. Either way, getting Spalding’s new iHoop will get everyone ready to go for a game.

The iHoop features a weatherproof compartment with an iPod dock. Plug in your iPod and two 3-inch speakers combined with a 5-inch subwoofer will gladly blast “Pump Up The Jam” for you and your crew. While the iHoop is the perfect idea for a basketball hoop, its execution begs to differ. Be prepared to shell out a whopping $1300 for nothing but net.

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Yo, girl! You comin’ from the Bronx?
Nah, bitch. I was sleepin’ like a fox.
Oh, true. You wanna go shop?
Of course, girl! Now watch me pop and lock (and kick it)

You know you want to dance
You’ve gotta move your feet
No more mister nice guy
Let’s move it off the street (now kick it)

My new purse is a boombox
From Audio Couture
Pumps out music from my iPod
These tunes become my cure (now kick it)

Stop, babe. Now hold on quick.
Last week you were all over his dick
Back off, bitch! Cant’cha see?
My shit got design from Loop NYC (said NYC)

You got a 3.5mm input
Now that’s a win

Just pick up your iPod and go to plug it in

Next thing thing you know, your ass will be shakin‘.

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Finding room for both an iPod dock and a lamp can be tough business when it comes to decking out your little end table. For iHome’s latest idea, the iLamp, preventing end table clutter will never be easier. It’s almost like every other iPod dock. It’s got a 6W speaker output and it differentiates by incorporating a bitchin’ light source for night reading.

Just like the iPod, the iLamp comes in a variety of different colors that will appeal to your ever changing lifestyle. Are you a vampire? Blood red is for you. Emo? Emo blue. Lacking in the hygiene department? Disgusting green. Anyone and everyone can get down with this double whammy of light and sound goodness. It’ll just cost you $89.99.

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OK, so take two parts awesome, one part iPod, add in a little bit of Bluetooth wireless connectivity and shake hard, very hard. The end result? The Miccus BluBridge for iPod. Just plug a small connector into your iPod and boom; you’re a streaming master, broadcasting tunes to any BluBridge audio setup. Did I mention the 330 foot range? That means you can chill with the chicks by the pool all whilst keeping the tunes blaring from your pocket. Very sweet.

At $59, you might as well plunk down another $129 and use the BluBridge mobile speaker. After all, your cousin borrowed $5000 last week for his latest “business endeavor” and you need to take a conference call with his investors. Thank goodness it doubles as a speakerphone for Bluetooth-enabled phones or we wouldn’t be here having this conversation. I’m serious. Way serious.

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Earlier, Ryan spotted some DIY speakers made from paper cups and a pair of headphones. Now Arms22 is one-upping designer Dimitry Zagga with speakers made from Starbucks cups. They actually use a power amplifier, meaning they’ll crank your tunes out at a respectable volume. If you want to make your own, go for it, as the instructions are available online. The caveat? They’re in Japanese.

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Either I’m on some awesome drugs that I don’t know about or the Russian artists who designed this oversized iPod are. OK, I just gave myself a blood test; I’m sober. That means that both Aristarkh Chernyshev and Alexei Shulgin are out of their skulls for crafting this large, warped, fully-functional iPod.

It looks like they put a giant iPod in a brick oven then, once it was well done, connected some 500 XL speakers to it. I can’t imagine the purpose of this thing besides a conversation piece while you shout over the loud music coming through it. That is, if you can get around the tiring effort you’d have to put forth while simply looking for a song. Count me out.

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You know you love those stock iPod headphones Apple offers, so why not kick it up a notch? Score a pair of the 500 XLs, a set of speakers designed to resemble iPod headphones, just 500 times larger than the original. It includes a power adapter and can also run on batteries if you want to drag them around with you. The speakers stand up by themselves thanks to the back of each earbud. Lovely design. Get them on ThinkGeek for only $50.

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If your neighbors piss you off or if you’re just an angry, bitter soul who wants to watch the world burn, then why not blast loud and obnoxious music to annoy everyone as you drive around the block? This mobile multichannel speaker car is every DJ’s wet dream. Can you imagine pulling up to the Minitek Electronic Music festival in one of these as you blast “Who Let the Dogs Out?” People would run for their lives.

Dutch artist Olaf Mooij is responsible for this monster stereo system that goes more than just bump in the night. He’s integrated 14 powerful speakers into the back of this hatchback he’s calling the DJ Mobile. It was originally designed to be used as a drivable PA, but now it is strictly for partying – hard.

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Conventional speaker design. It’s everything you loathe. The mediocrity, the bland coloring. You need a set of speakers that really lets you express yourself. Why not give the Bosix speakers a try? They come in wacky, bright colors and look like two watering can spouts mushed together.

According to Bosix, these are indeed 800W speakers, meaning you’re going to blow out the windows if you crank up the Van Halen on your iPod. $235 and they’re yours to keep.

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