Offbeat

In an attempt to become one with his inner deer, 32-year-old Chinese artist Luo Dan has been wearing a deer mask, everyday, for the past four years.

His under bite says no, but the Velociraptor living in his beard says yes.

I prefer perfection out of my dolls. How am I supposed to convince Ken to keep up appearances with this train wreck? He won't have it. He'll leave her and play the field. Yo, what up Monster High. You frequent this graveyard often?

Disney, you have no idea what you're missing. LucasArts could have shot you right back into the geeky boys' hearts. And you drop it? Just like that? Do you have any idea how crazily obsessed us Star Wars nerds get? Nope. apparently not.

Things just shouldn't be oversized, that's the secret. Large things that shouldn't be large engages my sheer terror instinct. Stay tiny, my friends.

I refuse to admit that my eyes would lie to me this bad. I mean, me and my eyes have had some tussles. But I will NEVER, EVER, EVER let them live it down if I discover they've lied to me again. Not this time. Now way! There's an ice cream scooper with your name on it, bub.

At a steep $750, these over-sized pillows don't come cheap, not even based on the snootiest of standards.

Just ouch.

I bet you never thought you'd see Woody from Toy Story bitch-slapping some hoes. Okay, well maybe you did. Who knows with you people.

Jesus 'bout to be resurrected e'ry day up in this bitch. These Plush Peeps help keep the spirit of Easter alive year-round, replicating one of the most beloved seasonal sweets of all-time.