Offbeat

Disney, you have no idea what you're missing. LucasArts could have shot you right back into the geeky boys' hearts. And you drop it? Just like that? Do you have any idea how crazily obsessed us Star Wars nerds get? Nope. apparently not.

Things just shouldn't be oversized, that's the secret. Large things that shouldn't be large engages my sheer terror instinct. Stay tiny, my friends.

I refuse to admit that my eyes would lie to me this bad. I mean, me and my eyes have had some tussles. But I will NEVER, EVER, EVER let them live it down if I discover they've lied to me again. Not this time. Now way! There's an ice cream scooper with your name on it, bub.

At a steep $750, these over-sized pillows don't come cheap, not even based on the snootiest of standards.

Just ouch.

I bet you never thought you'd see Woody from Toy Story bitch-slapping some hoes. Okay, well maybe you did. Who knows with you people.

Jesus 'bout to be resurrected e'ry day up in this bitch. These Plush Peeps help keep the spirit of Easter alive year-round, replicating one of the most beloved seasonal sweets of all-time.

A portion of I-79 running through Harrison County, West Virginia was shut down Tuesday afternoon after a mysterious LEGO spill occurred across multiple lanes of the highway. Interstate 79 was reduced to one lane as workers cleaned up the most fun driving obstruction ever.

When people say they want a fairy tale wedding, I don't think this is exactly what they mean. Paul Bellas and Heidi Coxshall dressed as Shrek and Fiona for their holy union.

This is why geeky dudes never leave the safety of their parent's basement. Because of the grip of terror instilled by the geeky woman who pursue us. Look at these damn things! Terrifying! Awesome... but terrifying!