Beer Pong Raft Ruins The Game

Oh shit, get on those pro flip cup gloves, we got ourselves a game of beer pong that isn’t all fun and games on your Nintendo Wii. It’s Port-O-Pong, the amphibious portable beer pong table.

OK, so it’s just a fucking raft with some grooves for the cups that completely eliminate the chances of cups toppling over from a fast ball throw. Half of beer pong is trying to knock your opponents cups over so they’re force to lick the beer off the table. It sucks for the suckers, but hey, it’s house rules. For $54.95, buy a rickety wooden table and some plastic cups instead of this spill-proof raft that ruins beer pong altogether. Seriously what is a beer pong match without beer spilling everywhere? Leisurely drinking, that’s what.

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8 comments

  1. Anyone who plays on that thing isn’t playing Beer Pong!

  2. What a piece. Save the money go get some beer.

  3. What about for playing in the water?? Ever think of that fools?

  4. Hey guys,

    Funny you say this, that’s why our website features an extremely cool beer pong table that you can bounce on, and doesn’t bind the cups in place. Andd it’s resist to waves…

    http://www.dormgear.net/inflatapong-floating-beer-pong-table.html

    Check it out ๐Ÿ™‚

    This will make you feel better hopefully! We only hand pick the coolest products.

  5. Your all idiots except the last guy its striclty a pool pong table not a take it anywhere and the fool who published this saying spilling beer is the best part of beer pong obviously cant make a shot and has to nolan ryan every cup shoot the ball dont throw it pussy beer spilled is beer wasted and that aint cool so quit complaining about costs when your trying to spil half your beer on the table instead of drink it

  6. Regarding the Dormgear comment – inflatapong is worse than the port-o-pong product because at least you know what you’re getting with port-o-pong. That’s why I went with the inflatapong – it sounds a lot better BUT – the most important part of the Inflatapong product – or any beer pong product – is the surface you play on. That is why Inflatapong is the WORST product out there – because the surface they came up with WARPS VERY EASILY. What worse than that actually is the fact that Inflatapong knows this – to the degree that they add BS instructions with the product about how to unwarp it. Guess what – you don’t unwarp something that warps – and even if you could (the instructions do not work and I haven’t been able to find any other way to unwarp it) it would just warp again! This product REALLY SUCKS! DO NOT BUY! Let these schmoes take their loss on the product because they deserve it for producing such a piece of junk and then false advertising it. Until the price drops below the price of the cheapest pool raft you can find inflatapong is not worth it.

  7. @ the previous poster:

    Just bought an inflatable beer pong table that absolutely blows these out of the water (no pun intended).

    http://www.airpong.net. you’re welcome.

  8. Wow – this review could not be more off the mark. The first guy turns out to be the guy who owns a beer pong company and copied the port-o-pong – so how is that a reliable review. and the other people all sell portopong now too and half the product people listed hear dont exist. I got those stupid floating triangles at spencers too – that was a waste. i was trying to save money but turns out they just spin in circles. We sucked it up and spent the $40 on a portopong at http://www.portopong.com this past summer and cancun was aweome! it was worth it, yes i would not play a tournament with it but 3 dudes and 8 chicks in the islands at a swim up bar was pretty fun for the money. Hope people read this before they waste money like so many others did.

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