Spoon With Built-In Scale Is A Great Gift For Your Local Drug Dealer

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Those clumsy scales your drug dealer uses to measure out your share of the cocaine is not as easy to use as it appears. It’s years of drug dealing experience that have led to his expert use. If you feel the need to get your local drug dealer something they will actually use, and not snort away, but can’t afford a plush-covered Porsche this Spoon with a Built-In Scale is a little something sweet.

No guarantees on whether purchasing this item for them will spare you the trouble of having a few fingers cut off in return of your debt, but he might just let you keep your balls if the scale spoon, which measures accurately within 1?10 gram, happens to be on the back of his mind as he slices. — Andrew Dobrow

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3 comments

  1. Why the drug angle on this, I’m sure there are lots of other legitimate uses?

  2. Because people always look for the bad in everything…they are all losers.

  3. Give it a rest!!! It’s called SATIRE!!! You know… humor???

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