Daddy, The Lamp Touched Me In The Pee Pee

Every time I wake up….I feel, well, scared.

My old desk lamp. It used to be a simple thing. Antique, 60-watt light bulb and an old maize lampshade. Those were the days. Then, after six years of fine service, it finally broke. Father picked me out a new one and I must say I’m not pleased. He chose the Babushka lamp from Mathmos. Technically, it’s a beautiful light. It’s almost like a work of art.

Except works of art don’t touch your wee wee in the middle of the night.

I promised the Babushka lamp I wouldn’t ever leave it. Ever. At $745, I can understand why, but boy does it scare me some nights.

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