Attention, scientists! For a whopping twenty five bucks, you can be the proud owner of ThinkGeek’s latest toy: The Bacteria Growth Science Kit. It comes with a petri dish, an eye dropper, pipettes, test tubes and packages of Agar. Remember Agar? It’s that stuff that you’d use in science class as a kid to grow bacteria, which is exactly the aim of this kit. That shit loves to grow with Agar.
Here’s a bedside light and clock that looks like something the infamous TokyoFlash would come up with. It’s a clock represented by different colored lights. You read the clock left to right and each different color is a specific number. I’m sure with a little training, you could get it down pat but imagine waking up at 3:27 AM trying to figure out what time it is. Seems like a hassle. At least it makes for great mood lighting. $75, no colorblind people please.
Yet another watch from Tokyo Flash that requires a mathematical formula just to tell time. This is no joke. Telling time on a watch modeled after my bitchin’ 10 pack of abs shouldn’t be a problem so long as you remember what each color of the transitioning LEDs represents.
Named the Kisai Tenmetsu, this Tokyo Flash watch joins the club of mold breaking designs. Made of aluminum and finished with a soft alumite coating, this is one watch that will have strangers asking you for the time. It’s a damn shame you won’t have a response. The Kisai Tenmetsu is available in silver or black for $257.
Insert witty sentence here. No puns, please.
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Just when you thought the Infection or the Negative were hard-to-read watches, in comes Storm’s Ambition wristwatch. It’s just a bunch of slits in a slab of metal. That is, until you power it up and the time shines through like the LEDs from your 1988 alarm clock. The Ambition comes in silver, black, brown or red finishes and retails for about $160. Not too shabby and not too crazy. Just the way we like it.
We can never get enough of these TokyoFlash watches. The company is notorious for making watches that are nearly impossible to read, such as the Infection or the Eleeno E3. Thankfully, it’s newest creation, the Negative, is actually readable.
That’s because it presents the time normally, except what makes this watch special is its display of time in negative space. Highlighted surrounding squares define the unlit squares on the screen which display the time digitally. It comes in black or silver and on top of that, each watch is capable of switching between seven different colors. That’s a different color for each day in the week! Additionally, the watch has a vertical or horizontal display option, several alarm functions, 12/24 hour mode and multi-color mode, which randomly sends the watch on a fritz as it switches among all seven of its available colors. For $160 dollars, this watch is a bargain as it’s as cool as they come (digitally) and will make you stand out during a nightly gathering.
Kids love colorful shit that looks like it’s right out of the early 1990s. Case in point: Swinx. Swinx is supposedly a game system designed by the Dutch that interacts with children. Your kids run around with these RFID-enabled colored wristbands and a clover-shaped base station alerts children to the game they’ll be playing.
Sound confusing? That’s because we’re not children. Kids eat this shit up, trust me. It involves bright colors, running around like a wreck loose and pissing your pants. You call it Swinx. I call it Saturday night.
Leave it to TokyoFlash to make yet another completely useless watch. This time around though, the company has created a watch I’d actually want to wear. Dubbed “Infection”, this watch emulates a colorful petri dish full of organisms (I said organisms, not orgasms. Get your mind out of the gutter.) There’s 27 multi-colored LEDs moving around that, apparently, can somehow tell you the time. Check this:
Twelve red LEDs indicate hours, eleven yellow LEDs represent the progression of time in groups of five minutes and four green LEDs show single minutes.
How the fuck am I supposed to tell what time it is if I’m wasted at the club? I can imagine the dialogue would go something like this:
Chick: Hey! Do you have the time?
Me: One second, lemme put down my whiskey check my watch.
Me: Sorry, I can’t read this fucking thing. You wanna dance?
Tokyoflash is known for its head-scratching induced confusion with their watch designs and this 3rd release of the popular Eleeno model, which is availalbe for around $80, is no exception.
To read the time, first read the number of LCD blocks in the top row of windows for hours, the second block of windows for 10-minute increments, and the bottom row of windows for the minutes. Which seems easy enough, but just try doing that multiple times per day and tell me if thats not annoying. The design might just be worth the inconvenience though. — Andrew Dobrow
Want a watch that takes forever to actually figure out what it says? With today’s society forgetting how to read analog clocks, this watch is definitely something we do not need. The JLr7 displays the time by encoding it and allowing you to decode it though its eight rows of colored “L”s. No doubt, this watch looks awesome; it’s not scarry futuristic, it’s just sleek and smooth. Also a no doubt, you will throw it away after a day of people asking you: what is it, how do you read it, why do you have it, how’s my hair? (maybe not the last one…) The LJr7 only costs about $85, pretty cheap for a watch that looks this nice. So if you feel the need to tax your brain even more than you do, get this watch. More info on decryption after the jump.
