TAG RESULTS FOR: protection

11 Completely Insincere Steps to Safeguarding Your Home Against Burglars

Some of these might actually work if you were ridiculous enough to pull it off, or if your would-be thieves were really, really stupid. For one, everyone knows a simple Dell sticker wouldn’t cover the MacBook’s Appleness because there is no way to cover up its halo or the omnipresent glow that surrounds your levitating body when you use one. Everything else? Completely doable if you have the right tools and the complete lack of brain cells. Hit the jump... Continue reading

Broadsword Umbrella Will Vanquish Your Enemies, As Long As Your Enemy Happens to Be Rain

Cower in fear mere mortal droplets of precipitation. Hark, your arch-nemesis has arrived. The Broadsword Umbrella protects any noble knight from their moist destiny. The clouds shall not unleash their condensed wrath without a fight. The Broadsword Umbrella goes perfect with any gentlemanly attire, but it probably looks pretty cool in the nude too. Get your very own for $39.99.

Glow-in-the-Dark iPhone Case Makes Your Device Look Radioactive

AccessoryGeeks.com sent us over one of their awesome Premium Glow-in-the-Dark iPhone Cases and over the last few hours we’ve been playing around with it, giving the case a little run for its money. First off, the mere thought of having a glow-in-the-dark iPhone is insanely awesome. Glow-in-the-dark capability is just one of those features the Apple should have included from the get-go. I mean, come on Mr. Ives, don’t you know what geeks like? Check out our review after the... Continue reading

Chainmail Chess Set

I’ve had chess sets destroyed, maliciously sacked by an epic battle rudely interrupting a game in mid-turn. I swore that it will NEVER happen again. I refuse to lose a game in progress just because I’m on a crusade for religious freedom. This Chainmail Chess Set is made of the same stuff I use to protect myself from sword wounds while looking damn cool in the process. Chainmail chess adds an element of realism not included with other sets, produced... Continue reading

Pocket Knife / Ruler Combo Allows You Measure Your Stab Wounds

In this cut-for-cut world, where every average gangster and granny is packing a blade, you’ve gotta defend your own. This Pocket Knife / Ruler combo gadget lets you not only do some serious stabbing, but lets you easily measure your stab wounds on the way to the hospital. Doctors always love it when you come prepared. Link [via]

Heads Will Roll: Dragon Titanium Helmet

When you’re going 140 MPH on a motorcycle, why would you even consider cheaping out on the best safety equipment available to man? Now peep this Dragon Titanium motorcycle helmet, designed by Italian Prime. It’s lightweight, yet strong as an ox. And the design? Totally killer. A classic look that will look great on any style of motorcycle. It even prevents allergies. Can you say your current helmet does that? Didn’t think so. No price has been set but be... Continue reading

SENZ Umbrellas

Here in New York City, when it rains, it pours. The rain comes down, the wind howls at 50 MPH and everything seems to sit still in time as you fight the storm in an effort to get home. If you’re using a cheap store-bought umbrella, chances are it broke 10 minutes ago. The SENZ Storm Umbrella fixes that. Its angular design lets it withstand winds up to 70 MPH and it can even take a beating from hailstorms. At... Continue reading

Swine Flu 2009 Face Mask: Let’s Die of Laughter!

Stop making out with that pig for a second and thing about the risks of swine influenza. There are people dropping dead all around us (mostly Mexicans, thank god) and it seems like there is nothing we can do about it. We here at Gearfuse like to mix a little humor in with our pandemics. That’s why we’ll be wearing these awesome Pig Snout Face Masks once the germ is airborne in our area. If we’re going to die, we’re... Continue reading

Get Smart: Egg Edition

Alright chief. We have five minutes and I mean exactly five minutes to get these six hard boiled eggs to Mayor Bloomberg. You can’t lose them and if they fall on the ground, we’re finished I tell ya. The man needs his breakfast. Here, use my special egg suitcase for the task. It’ll hold all six of Bloomy’s eggs in one basket so to speak. Great joke, right? Wrong! Now get going officer. The fate of New York City rests... Continue reading

iCage, The Bike Lock For Your iPod

Master Lock claims that 4-percent of all robberies are due to iPod thefts, so why not slap a bike lock on it? You just spent your entire month’s allowance on that brand new iPod Touch. Now, you’re looking for a lock so you can hang it up on any street post to force the general public into listening to whatever it is you listen to nowadays. You’ll be dismayed to know that Master Lock’s iCage, the metal case that secures... Continue reading