Wednesday , 23 April 2014
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Unevenly Distributed: Gadget Blogging, The Human Centipede

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If I were to equate gadget blogging to some occupation in a slice of modern cinema, the film that most immediately comes to mind is The Human Centipede: First Segment. That 2010 parable, directed by Tom Six, focuses on the misadventures of three people who, through a wacky series of missteps, are each sewn... shall we say... input-to-output to one another. Gadget blogging, you see, is primarily an act of chain digestion. Read More »

Unevenly Distributed: How I Learned To Stop Worrying And Love The @

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I start this column with only one aim. I would like to try to impart my love for one of the oldest, and most impenetrable, and aesthetically unattractive, and sociopathic and schizophrenic genres of computer game to a reader who will doubtlessly hate it for all of those exact reasons. I'm talking about rogue-likes, so called because of their ancestry in a progenitor called Rogue. Let's see how I do. Read More »

Unevenly Distributed: Disillusionment, Clark Nova, The MacBook Air & The Perfect Writer’s Machine

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After fifteen years I've finally found the perfect writer's machine in the new 11.6-inch MacBook Air. It fuses together both the best software and hardware of which a writer could ever dream, while boasting all of the slender and effortless portability of a composition journal. It is a writer's terminal in the purest sense: with its excellent battery life, ephemeral weight, satisfying keyboard and instant-on capabilities, the new MacBook Air is perfectly suited to be the nexus into the inner chaos of my own thoughts, feelings, hang-ups, pretensions and emotions as a blank page. So why isn't writing any easier? Read More »

Unevenly Distributed: Chrome, the iPad and the Crossroads of Civilization

On October 7th, 1930 slender and bright; like a string tense and silent in anticipation of the purpose of her note Beatrice Warde was introduced to the British Typographer's Guild. The speech she gave would change the way people thought about type for the next fifty years... and should be burnt into the flesh of anyone who is making a gadget to this day. Read More »

How Will You Survive the Zombie Apocalypse?

Greetings beloved GEARheads! The zombie apocalypse is near. Many a raving hobo have been telling me this over the years, and they can’t all be wrong. Just because they haven’t showered in nearly a decade doesn’t make them crazy. No, that’s the schizophrenia’s fault. So my little love muffins, I want you to take a look to your left and ... Read More »

Happy New Year Jews and Jewettes!

Ahh, my fellow brothers and sisters. It’s that time of the year where we celebrate the new year. As 5770 comes to an end and 5771 begins, we reflect on the past year’s indiscretions. Indiscretions in our home life, indiscretions in our relationships and indiscretions with farm animals, and we ask for forgiveness and make an oath to ourselves to ... Read More »

We Hereby Proclaim that Today be Known as Labor Day!

In honor of all expectant mothers out there, we’ll be practicing a day of silence to celebrate the hours of hard work and intense pain than woman across the entire face of the planet are forced to experience during childbirth. We truly respect everything all of you mommies did for us on our day of birth, so much so that ... Read More »