I’m not a fast runner, by any stretch of the imagination. My man boobs usually get in the way of my aerodynamics.
But if one of these monstrosities were chasing after me, I’d Usain Bolt my ass out of there so quick that you could have sworn I had transformed into a Jamaican sprinter.
Each of these Zombie Lawn Gnomes by Design Toscano costs about $56. They are cast in resin and hand painted by artisans in protective bubbles.