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TAG RESULTS FOR: weight
Doormat Scale Breaks Your Guests’ Spirits
And they really thought they could avoid weighing themselves by hiding their own scale. Nice try, fatty. There’s no way to avoid your morbid obesity now. There’s no blaming it on your big bones. The scale doesn’t lie. Either does the fact that you can’t fit through my door without shimmying ever so delicately. The Doormat Scale won’t let your guests escape without knowing their true weight. Me? I’ll be using the back door from now on. Link [via]
Honda’s Walking Assist For The Sackless
I don’t know about you, but I’d find it quite difficult to take steps with this thing straddled in between my legs. Alas, it is Honda’s inevitable desire to give me blue balls with its latest device geared towards the disabled – the walking assist device with body weight support system. Honda is no stranger to assisted walking devices for the eldery, but it is treading in new waters by trying to get men to sit on this thing. If... Continue reading
Steve Jobs and The Search For A New Look
Jim Lynch over at Extreme Tech wrote a funny post we just couldn’t ignore. Almost the entire column goes over how much Steve Jobs is in dire need of a wardrobe intervention. All of his clothes are either too short or too baggy due to his recent loss of weight. C’mon Steve, you’ve got cash, you can afford leather. Anything but those horrid workout clothes you’re always sporting. What would you want to see Steve in? Pierre Cardin? BOSS? Link
Lotus Eco Elise Eats Grass, Shits Flowers
The Lotus Elise is a car known for its light weight and unique design. Now, those are all preliminary factors with the Eco Elise. Everything about this car circles around saving the world one step at a time. Water-based paint job? Check. Hemp, I repeat: Hemp interior? Check. Solar panels? Check. What the fuck does this car not have that’s thinking about the environment? I got it! An engine that doesn’t run on fossil fuel. So, regardless of the gasoline... Continue reading
Weight-Loss Belt For Fatties
Are you an overwhelming fat ass that just can’t shred those pounds because going to the gym is another chore on your list of things you won’t do? Well, your prayers have been answered! The Vibro Shape slimming belt is said to rid you of your beer-belly in favor of some sexy washboard abs. The belt can also be used on the shoulders, hips, and thighs for a full body workout and a safe auto timer will turn the unit... Continue reading
LiveLuggage Makes Transporting Entire Wardrobe An Ease
No one likes hauling ridiculously heavy bags around the airport. LiveLuggage’s Power Assisted series uses a special wheel to make your traveling a heck of a lot more lightweight. This luggage is designed to distribute 85% of the total weight directly upon the wheels, making you feel you’re only carrying a fraction of it. The intelligent torque control powers the wheels and the pressure is applied to the handle, leading to the concentration of force sensors at the base. The... Continue reading
Overall Health Balance Scale Rates Your Health, Deflates Your Ego
Hey, fatty / string bean / muscle man / average weight person or otherwise. Yeah, I’m talking to you. Why must you lie to yourself? You think you’re so healthy, but trust me, there must be something wrong with you. And whatever it is, you bet your ass the Overall Health Balance Scale finds it and taunts you with it. To be honest, there are other scales that might take the same exact measurements. The Overall device measures your weight,... Continue reading
MiBody: Because We’re Fat, Untoned, And Dehydrated (And Very Proud Of It!)
I’ve had girlfriends in the past that have been utterly terrified of the scale. They’d rather be seen wearing this hat in public than know how much they weigh (and god forbid if I were to glance over their shoulder and glimpse a digit or two.) We can only imagine that MiBody would be those ladies’ equivalent of the apocalypse. And we shudder to think what could happen if they ever hear of DoCoMo’s ego-crushing phone. Not only does the... Continue reading
When You Can’t See The Scale Over Your Protruding Gut…
…It’s time for a new scale. The Eye Level Wireless Scale allows you to read your weight, even if your tummy is too large to view the weight on a typical floor scale. Though, before the thought “Wow, I think I need a new scale” enters your mind, hopefully the thought “Wow, I really need to lose some weight” is the initial phrase which pops into your cranium. The scale provides a handy accessory to hold which wirelessly transmits your... Continue reading
A Belt That Shares Your Weight With The World
Rather than measuring by inches, this belt is designed to guesstimate your weight. The larger your waist, the higher the weight will show as with the Weight Belt. Using this belt in conjunction with the ego-crushing phone could solve your over-confidence issues in a snap. The problem with this is if you have a really large ass, or have your mother’s hips (even if you’re a guy), the belt might guess your weight to be higher. Something tells me the... Continue reading
