Little Late On The Beer Belt

Not every belt is built for hard liquor. Some are built for hops lovers others for gay pirates, but man oh man, I could’ve used this in high school. As for college, I slept next to a mini-fridge, no $18 beer belt needed. This belt reminds me of my senior year in high school. The chess team had just won their final match and needless to say I was ecstatic. Some of the “in crowd” were throwing a “school’s out for the summer” party, complete with Alice Cooper music and all. Yet, when I showed up with a friend of mine, we were not welcome. This made my blood boil.

When my blood boils, I do stupid shit. The kind of crap you go to jail for. While all the party goers were in the basement, dicking around with their inflatable Beer Pong Table, my friend and I raided the fridge.  For one reason or another, no one at this party was anywhere near the beer-filled fridge. Bad move. Unfortunately, like every other person,  I only have two hands. If only I had had this beer belt, I would’ve been able to grab more than the six beers I shoved in my cargo pockets and the two beers in each of my hands. Contrary to popular belief, another six beers will make a difference.

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Cool Toys: Dog That Vomits Slime

Filed under: Gaming, Misc. Gadgets

Toys sure have evolved over the years. It went from the basic teddy bear, to Creepy Crawlers (remember those fuckers?), to Mighty Max to the dog that vomits slime. Come August, toy company Mega House, a subsidiary of Bandai, will ship “Biri Biri Kaze Hiki Wanko” or “Shocking Sick Puppy”, a Japanese toy guaranteed to disgust many parents out there.

It plays like the classic game, Operation. Reach into the pooch’s mouth and grab the germs. Touch the slime and your ass gets shocked back into the Stone Age. Collect the most germs, you win. A simple, yet, disgustingly awesome game.

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Turd Twister molds poop

Filed under: Misc. Gadgets

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There’s really no words that can express how thoroughly revolting this product is. The Turd Twister starter kit (is there an advanced kit?!) comes with 10 popular designs and shapes that you can mold your excrement into.

Why would anyone want to use this? Please tell us this is meant as a gag gift and nothing more. Or we might have to vomit profusely now. — Andrew Dobrow

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