Gearfuse

Drinking is always fun, but finding creative new ways to get smashed never ceases to please. The Shotcarver is a $12 gizmo that will instantly carve a shot glass out of anything that’s malleable. Have an apple? Carve that core out and load it up with 99 Apples. Boom. The next time it snows in your area, pack up a snow ball, freeze it in your freeze and carve out a shot glass later on.

I actually really dig this thing. It’s inexpensive and a fun way to get the night going. What more could you ask for?

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Remember when you were young? Days filled with school, pencils and dog anuses? Ahh, the good old days. I remember it like it were yesterday. Wait a second, that’s because it was yesterday! Thanks to these Dog Pencil Sharpeners. With the help of a mighty pet rectum, our pencils are never dull.

The funny this is, we don’t even use pencils! It’s totally for sexual pleasure entertainment value and that old feeling of nostalgia. There’s nothing quite like reliving the days of anally penetrating our pets with sharp writing utensils. Especially when it only costs $14.99. And for you kitty fans, there’s a cat flavor as well. Check it after the jump. (more…)

It was a fine spring day and I remember it well. I saw the last spoonful of yogurt I would ever love, and I let it slip away. My spoon just couldn’t reach to the lower corner of the container! I don’t think I can ever forgive myself for letting it go. If only I had known about the New Yogurt Spoon, which is made for just these sort of situations.

Perfectly contoured to reach even the tightest of corners, you’ll hopefully never have to deal with the same hardships I’ve had to deal with is you can manage to get your hands on this spoon. Do yourself a favor, never mind the Apple-esque advertising scheme. Never let that last bit of yogurt get away. You might regret it for the rest of your life. (more…)

Those clumsy scales your drug dealer uses to measure out your share of the cocaine is not as easy to use as it appears. It’s years of drug dealing experience that have led to his expert use. If you feel the need to get your local drug dealer something they will actually use, and not snort away, but can’t afford a plush-covered Porsche this Spoon with a Built-In Scale is a little something sweet.

No guarantees on whether purchasing this item for them will spare you the trouble of having a few fingers cut off in return of your debt, but he might just let you keep your balls if the scale spoon, which measures accurately within 1?10 gram, happens to be on the back of his mind as he slices. — Andrew Dobrow

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Remember the Ballpoint Eating Utensils I wrote about a few months back? This Outdoor Cutlery reminds me of that concept, though this time made for the outdoors man, rather than the cubicle man.

If your out in the woods, with none of your beloved silverware at hand, it would be nice to have a set of suitable cutlery to get the job done, without having to worry about getting a splinter on your tongue. The only thing you have to worry about is finding a branch laying around which tickles your fancy. After that, it’s just a matter of clipping the utensil heads onto the stick. — Andrew Dobrow

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They say the pen is mightier than the sword. But it would be pretty cool to have a cool knife extension to add on to the pen just in case. These eating utensil extensions for pens allow you to turn any average ballpoint into dining cutlery, or a weapon, depending on if you’re a cup-half-empty sort of guy.

Just imagine. The next time you see a only slightly soiled piece of chicken in someones trash can, you can whip out your pen and eat away. It’s funny how many gadgets can be turned into a hobo joke. — Andrew Dobrow

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