Kick ass pedal powered Panzers are fighting the good fight. The second annual Kensington Kinetic Sculpture Derby inspired a group of guys to construct a human powered Panzer Kampwagen III in 11 days for the purpose of crashing the party. By the time they were finished the tank, they were too tired to crash any party, so they just spent the night in the tank.

If you’re in the Philadelphia area, you can visit the tank where it is now being displayed as public art on the west side of Frankford Ave, just north of Norris St. This monstrous skeleton of gears and steel will be the first place you’ll want to go when the bombs drop.

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If your pussy is like mine, all dried up and withered away with boredom and fatigue, you could dupe it into sitting in a tank, airplane or firetruck to look cute for 8 seconds. Your pussy will put out fires, fight wars and even soar the skies. You can dupe your pussy into doing anything if you can get it to sit in a tank.

The cardboard playhouses takes some effort to put together but it’s nothing you and your pussy can’t handle. For $30, your pussy will either thank you for it or bite your dick off.

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No one is sure why Sangmin Bae designed the Rhythmfish system. Perhaps he got lonely and didn’t have anyone to talk to, so he built this device that records the movement of fish and the currents generated by them. The flow sensors inside the tank collect enough data then translate it into an audiovisual response, which is then displayed through a mounted LCD and speakers.

Sangmin Bae says:

“even if the fish can’t speak and express its feelings in a human way, it has an energy and communication skill in its own way. Vibration is the medium of interaction, and I chose it for its universality in the physical, emotional, and spiritual realms.”

While this isn’t true communication with fish, one thing is for certain: You can make a sporadically rockin’ visual coupled with random audio of the same nature. Try getting visuals like that on your Winamp plug-in.
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German artist Hans Hermert designed this Balloon Tank with what seems to be a very child-like mindset. With a rainbow collection of colors, the Tank looks like something from a clown’s dream.

Complete with an attached balloon gun turret on its top, the Balloon Tank probably wouldn’t do any good in a militairy excursion. From the looks of it, it would do better as a carnival booth game. — Andrew Dobrow

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The Church Tank is the brainchild of Russian artist Kris Kuksi, and you probably already guessed that it makes a statement about war in the name of religion. It’s not an actual tank, only a model measuring 8″ h 4″ w x 10″ d, but I have a feeling that a full-size version would generate a little too much drag to be practical in battle. —Sean Fallon

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