Siberia. You’re locked in a vicious poker game worth a $5 million pot. The wind howls outside and wood creaks with every movement. You look at the host. You and him both know that it’s cold and a fire is in order. The fireplace is out of commission, though, so what are you going to do? You could reach for that portable fireplace but you’ll have to forfeit your hand.

Easy! I’ll whip out my tabletop fireplace from Apoll. Sure, it set me back like $675 and shipping but what’s money when you have the warmth of a fire gracing your frozen hands? With Sterno-like fuel and a glass and steel frame, you won’t have any trouble getting some heat out of this gadget.

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Here’s something else, furniture called Ripple Series that imitates rippling mercury just like the Vertibral seating imitates spinal structure. It’s from designer Lee J. Rowland who happens to also be an aerospace engineer. And it shows with this out of this world furniture design that uses a three-dimensional machining process along with sheet metal to make these one of a kind desktops.

It’s no surprise these tables are also astronomical in price, ranging from $45,000 to $268,000. Yowza. Impressive Lee, but no thanks, I’d rather buy a condo then put a bunch of furniture made out of corks in it.

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Have you ever wanted a tabletop equalizer? No? Oh. Well this isn’t an equalizer, this is the SPEAQUALIZER! Yes! It’s true! For $40, this little baby will make colored lights hop and dance to all your tunes. The built-in mic helps it detect sound, so make sure the party is pumpin’ before you leave it on the coffee table for the night. Runs on four AAA batteries so it ends up costing way more than forty bucks.

Maybe if you indulge in a little LSD, it’ll become infinitely more valuable…

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