Packing in a mind-blowing 8o tools (75 of which you’ll likely never use), the Swiss Army SwissChamp XACT Knife is definitely not a pocket knife. In fact, you’ll be lucky if this thing even fits in your car.
While it features all of the traditional Swiss Army stuff such as a knife, can opener and tweezers, there’s a whole crap load of extra junk, including a ball point pen, a wrench, a chisel and the madness just goes on and on. Grand total? $425.
If you put enough sharp knives in the Swissarmius Cutlery Holder, you’ll have yourself one hell of a large multi-tool. While it’s not exactly pocket sized, you can cause some real damage with this thing.
No longer just for survival, this kitchen gadget will keep you fully equipped to handle any emergency which might arise in the preparation of an omelette.
A standard tool of the trade for all responsible Boy Scout’s is a Swiss Army Knife. There is no tool more well-suited for a future man, since guns are a little too harsh for 9 year olds. Now we know girl’s are mostly more delicate than the rough-and-tumble nature or boys. That’s why Boy Scout’s don’t sell cookies. It would be a besmearing to their future raging testicles.
So what tool does a Girl Scout use to replace the hell-raising army knife? The Swiss Peace Knife is a great tool for the Girl Scout and the peacenik alike. Featuring a pill box, bandages, disinfectant spray and a whistle instead of assorted knives, shovels, beer bottle openers, and other goodies. On second thought, with the amount of sexual abuse in the Boy Scout’s these days, a rape whistle might not be a bad idea. — Andrew Dobrow
