Gearfuse

Being super doesn’t make you immortal. The superheroes from our childhood are starting to look a little older than we’d like to admit.

Poor Superman has lowered himself into using a walker (hopefully not made of Kryptonite). Catwoman is fast asleep in her rocking recliner. The Hulk has withered into a hulking couch potato. Times they are a-changing. The elderly superhero exhibit is the work of La Maison Rouge.

Sorry Superman. If Kryptonite doesn’t do the tric, then time sure will.

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Who hasn’t dreamed of one day being a superhero? It’s one of those ambitions that you never lose as you transition from child to adult. When you’re a kid, you wear pajamas featuring your favorite superhero’s emblem. Some PJs even featured a cape for ultra-realism. Now, as adults, we can get somewhat of the same effect in a slightly matured style.

The Superhero Robers are available in Batman and Superman flavors. Depending on your superhero of choice, you to can pretend that you are out saving the streets, rather than just laying in bed and fantasizing.

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Wired.com has compiled a list of easily obtainable gadgets that’ll have you wearing tights quicker than Billy Elliot. If you’ve got cash like Tony Stark, chances are you were born to be a super hero. Super-natural powers are overrated. Batman kicks the piss out of everyone, so all you need are the right gadgets.

A grappling hook, jet pack, X-ray device and a boomerang are all the tools you’ll need at your disposal to mimic Inspector Gadget. This list is lacking weapons though, and someone needs to design devices that’ll make you a villain. Wait, if you’ve got a jet pack, what’s the grappling hook for?

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Christopher Reeves only had two enemies whom attacked his vulnerabilities the worst: Horses and Kryptonite, both for different reasons. Kryptonite was among the only materials known to man which could bring the mighty Superman to his knees (other than Lois Lane, of course.)

Rumor has it that Superman used Kryptonite as an excuse for his super limp noodle. “Are these sheets made of Kryptonite? Because, uh, you know, it sometimes has that effect.”

Designed in special protective casing, the Red, Gold, Blue and Green Kryptonite meteorites are all on display with this replica. Measuring 7.25″ x 10.75″ x 9.5″, the Kryptonite Replica Display is pure poison for anyone from the planet Krypton, but should be fine for us earthlings. Get your own for $275.

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Ever since you were a little kid you’ve wanted to be like superman, running around in tights and having your own symbol for everyone to know you by; don’t deny it. Well now you can fulfill your dream (at least part of it) of being like Superman with the Superman Projection AM/FM Clock Radio; no, this does not give you permission as a grown man to run around in tights. This clock radio projects the time and the Superman sign on the wall for you to gloat at, and in the morning wakes you up to the Superman theme, as composed by John Williams. If you feel as if you aren’t ready to take on the world when the music starts playing, just smack the giant Superman symbol on the clock that acts a the snooze button. Also, for those of you who don’t feel worthy to hear Superman music (or you’re just sick of it), you can have a traditional, regular person alarm sound. With such a cheap price of $19.99, maybe you should get this just as a self-esteem booster; you can wake up imagining that someone wants to see you in tights. — Nick Rice

Superman Projection AM/FM Clock Radio [via Gearlog]