Gearfuse

Either we can sit around cracking jokes about how this speaker looks like a certain phallic object or we can get on to the specs like professional adults. You’d rather crack dick jokes? OK, I’ll wait.

Good. Now that you’re done, let me give you the 411 on this speaker. It’s called the Spring Speaker and it has a whopping 4 watts of power. Before you get all disappointed, let me tell you about how you can charge this fucker via USB for up to four hours of playback time. Not too shabby, eh? Right. It comes with a headphone jack and a USB jack to ensure complete connectivity.

Back to your penis jokes, folks. Nothing to see here.

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Here in New York, it’s currently fashion week. What is it? It’s essentially a week where everyone goes batshit for new looks and afterparties. If only Mosley Tribes’ Spring 2009 lineup of sunglasses were available, I’d be able to get laid with Kirsten Dunst or an equally trashy blonde. That’s right. Slap on a pair of the Wayfarer-style glasses and sneak off to Brooklyn incognito, sipping PBR and smoking Camels throughout the trip.

Or you could just build a sweet pair of light-up Terminator glasses.

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Growing up, Ryan and I attended a pretty decent upper-middle class high school in New Jersey. We got in plenty of trouble and did a lot of bad shit, but one thing that never happened on a full-scale operation was the food fight. If we had used Zing spoons instead of shitty plastic sporks and other utensils, we’d have probably been expelled.

At $9.95, it’s a bit of an expensive spoon depending on how you look at it. Sure, you can eat all the apple sauce in the world with a Zing, but did you know that the handle bends like a spring? Thus, it allows you to fling food all over the cafeteria at a rapid pace. Line your sixth period lunch table up against the wall and perform the ultimate tribute to the St. Valentine’s Day Massacre.

I think every kid in elementary school should have one of these.

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Though I’m a bit too young to experience a true spring reverb pedal, I’m well aware they reign king over today’s digital alternatives. This DIY project from the Electronic Peasant has brought in a Slinky to really make things ridiculous. He’s used the stair-crawling toy to emulate a 1976 spring reverb unit.

How does it work? Glad you asked:

There are a number of different ways to send vibrations travelling down a spring, but most spring reverbs use torsional (rotational) motion, which is less sensitive to interference from external vibrations. Here is an experiment that The Peasant did with a Slinky Jr (R) and some old speaker drivers which delivers loooonng delay low frequency DIY reverb for almost no cost.

If you’re looking for that reverb and barely have enough cash for dinner, might wanna give this a try.

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Spring and summer are just around the corner, and that means whipping out the old grill for some Fourth of July barbecue. Mmm…ribs. The temperature can get pretty steamy in these seasons, but not nearly as hot as when you are cooking over the grill. Some people hate the heat so much they resort to cooking their burgers in less orthodox ways. The BBQ Fan and Light make sure you have a constant stream of fresh air headed your way.

We can deal with minor retina burns and smoke flowing into our tear ducts, making us look like blubbering fools, but what we cannot deal with is our perfectly manicured hair becoming greasy with sweat. After hours of placing every strand in its right place, there is just no need to ruin it for the sake of delicious meats. Well, maybe for meats, but definitely not so other people can enjoy those meats! Get yours for $45. (more…)

Grab your baskets, cooler, and your favorite lady, and take a stroll out to the park because picnic planning just got a lot easier. The Spontaneous Picnic Dress doubles as a faux-retro fashion statement for your girl, while offering a place to lounge, eat, and possibly even mix up some drinks if the picnic spirit chooses you for its outdoor eating agenda. Remember to watch out for that meddling Yogi Bear.

Made using 3 food related fabrics (although the dress most likely doesn’t taste very good), the “Buttercup” dress is great for a Spring venture to your favorite picnicking spot. Oh, and not to mention easy access to the va-jay-jay for a little post-lunch fornication. — Andrew Dobrow

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Some Japanese dude has decided to play sword with phones, and he’s using the Mitsubishi D903iTV DMB one-button push slider to attack the Panasonic P902i, which also has a one-button push spring mechanism for the folder (Neither of them is cheap). In the GSM world, we can only throw Nokia N95 at people. –Sam Chan