For those not familiar with Marc Owens’ work, he’s the man behind the Avatar Machine. It’s a suit which allows the user to view themselves as a virtual character in real space via a head mounted interface. Now he’s working on another suit that’s sure to turn heads. According to a study that found that 54 percent of all males and 68 percent of all females gender swap in a virtual setting, psychologists have proven that the majority of people aren’t satisfied with their gender and want to cut their genitals out.

Thankfully, Marc Owens has the cure. If you’re the kind of guy that feels comfortable dressing up in your mother’s clothes or the kind of girl whose always wanted to play QB on the high school football team then the Virtual Transgender Suit was made for you. It replicates the aesthetics of the typical virtual female form while portraying it in physical form, kind of like if you were to act out Facebook in a real life setting. So, if cross dressing just seems a little too gay for you, how about trying out the Virtual Transgender Suit? You’ll look like a woman but no one will criticize you because you’ll look like a virtual woman.

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So, we’re at the Last HOPE Conference in New York. The moment we arrived at the Pennsylvania Hotel, we took the escalator upstairs to the showroom floor. We were then greeted by this blossoming solar powered dildo flower thing. Whew, that’s a mouthful, and so are all those dildos!

Glass or rubber, these lamps have it all. Dildos, butt plugs, anal beads and pretty much any love stick imaginable decorate the light, but perhaps most importantly is the center piece.  Surrounded by your typical dildos is the eye popping mega-butt plug. I’d love to meet the girl daring enough to join forces with it.

A combination of steel, LEDs, solar electronics and a sick mind are all Randy Polumbo needed to craft these perverted lamps which are ideal for any bachelor pad. Invite a bunch of your lady friends over and see how many of them can sit on it simultaneously.  It’d be like king of the mountain, except more erotic. If you like his work, hit the jump below for more pics and his website.

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Finally, a self-proclaimed “perfect woman” robot. AI Robotics has created a fully functional robot woman who won’t get tired of your sloppiness, leave you for another man or stop giving head just because you got married. The robot’s name is LISA and she can cook, shop, clean, give back rubs, get naked, get dressed, suck a mean dick, recharge herself automatically and to top it all off: she’s got an IQ of 130. You’d be lucky to find an organic woman with an IQ of 130.

Sure, she has a creepy look to her, but when did that ever stop you from knocking boots with someone? You’ll get your chance to bang one come June 11.

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How many times has your wife bitched you out for buying ugly kitchen appliances? I’m sure if you’re like any normal couple, it’s happened plenty of times and the both of you are sick of it. In comes the Salad Plant to save the marriage day!

Essentially, it’s a plastic plant when you have both tongs placed inside the pot. Yank the tongs out and you’ll become the ultimate salad-tossing machine. As an added bonus, you can use the pot to hold the salad. Sure, it’s a bit offbeat, but who isn’t these days? Plunk down $25 and make the wife happy.

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As a male, I’ve never had the pleasure of bleeding from my genitalia (except for this one time in Tijuana), and I can’t say that I’m too disappointed about it. But I know that keeping track of that sort of thing is important if you don’t feel like paying for another mouth to feed. Seasonique is a concept for women, which improves on the old birth control pill holders by creating a new contraceptive dispenser.

Seasonique not only holds three-months of birth control pills, rather than the traditional one-month, but adds in some new functionality and style, such as the daily one-click mechanism, which unveils to open up a special pill slot on top of its see-through panel. — Andrew Dobrow

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How do robots reproduce? Well, of course, the same way humans do. By being constructed in a lab. But how do robot’s experience the ultimate robotic satisfaction? By following the Robotic Kamasutra.

If Arnold is really the Terminator, he’s going to have some real fun once he gets a hold of this information. Note that this is not for human-on-robot action. The thought of metal chafing my naughty bits is enough to turn me off. Sadly, I had to learn it the hard way. More kinky action after the jump. (more…)

Fatties who recently lost a ton of weight like to joke around, saying things like “Wow, my fat jeans are so big that I can fit another person in them.” Ok, that’s great. You used to be fat. It doesn’t seem as impressive that you can fit another person in those jeans when something like Fundies is available for only $4.99.

As the packaging states, here is what is included “4 Legs And 2 Rears (2 Close Friends Not Included)” I would like to add that their are not two enemies or acquaintances included either. Another quote from the statement seems like an apt description. “Half the fun is getting in them, the other half’s up to you.” — Andrew Dobrow

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Most chicks don’t dig anal. They might put up with it to keep us happy and, more importantly, to shut us up, but it’s not the most pleasant feeling to have her whimper the whole time. The Bitchcruiser Bike puts a literal rod up the ass of an unsuspecting sex doll, allowing you to cruise around with a bloodless sex dummy as your bike’s dashboard.

If the feeling of anal dominance is important enough for you to show off on your daily bike route, you can pick up the Bitchcruiser from eBay for the high price of $2,300. But something tells us, if you own this bike, the only real ass you might be getting could possibly be leaving soon. — Andrew Dobrow

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When I forget to turn off a lamp in my house, I get pissed off. It’s not an anger management issue. It’s a “I’m a cheap Jew bastard” issue. Utilities are expensive! Despite my adherence to the Jewish faith, this is one lamp I wouldn’t mind leaving on for days on end, even if it were only to make myself look pimp. No matter how pathetic it might seem.

The Sex In Progress lamp is like a step up from the old “Do Not Disturb” sign. Sure, it’s slightly more blunt. But at least they know you’re not kidding. Well, unless you’re really ugly. Get your own for $24.95. – Andrew Dobrow

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