Most people are clumsy others are just plain stupid. That’s why these $39 dollar Flower Fire Extinguishers exist. It’s for those wanna-be chefs out there that like to light oil and/or alcohol ablaze to explode the flavor of their creation but only ever ends in an explosion of fire in their face.

They look like decorative flowers but, much like the Transformers, they’re more than meets the eye. When you find yourself in the midst of a cooking fire you’ll need to think fast, that’s why these flowers have a magnet on them so they’ll cling to most surfaces around your stove. When that pan goes up in flames, simply place the flowers in it and they will work their magic, covering the oil with a disgusting film that prevents the breakout of the flames and ruins your appetite for dinner in the process. It beats burning alive because of someone’s clumsiness.

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Here’s a great idea gone wrong. Take the piggy bank. A staple of American childhood that has taught us how to save for a rainy day. You put money in and don’t take anything out until it’s full. Enter the ATM bank. It’s a fully-operational ATM and will keep a tally of how much money you put in. Need to make a withdrawal? It comes its very own debit card so you can take out cash for fat sack of buds. I really don’t see today’s generation of children saving money with a bank like this.

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First, D-Link put routers in your pocket. Now, they’re thinking about the environment. D-Link is proud to claim it’s the first manufacturer to produce green home network WiFi routers capable of saving up to 40% in power usage. These routers are like a thoughtful roommate who never leaves the TV on or forgets to put the toilet seat down. With the ability to detect cable length and link status, they’ll adjust power accordingly, so you’re not racking up that electric bill for nothing. Each router can also be programmed to turn the WiFi radio off in an effort to save power.

D-Link has equipped three of their routers with this new technology: D-Link Xtreme N Gigabit Router DIR-665, Xtreme N Duo Media Router DIR-855 and the Xtreme N Gaming Router DGL-4500. While the new green ethernet technology affects each router differently, you can be sure that surfing the web without ruining the planet has never been easier, so long as you’re not using that Buffalo Nfinity.

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Later this year, Microsoft will be retailing its new wireless mouse specifically designed for easy transit. Gone are the days of the tiny transportable mouse for your laptop that makes your hand look like an amputated limb from Andre The Giants body.

It’s a full-sized mouse that folds into a space-saving form that’ll fit anywhere from your laptop case to your underpants. Unfolding the Microsoft Arc mouse in front of everyone on the train will make them wish they had a mouse as big as yours!

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The Lotus Elise is a car known for its light weight and unique design. Now, those are all preliminary factors with the Eco Elise.   Everything about this car circles around saving the world one step at a time. Water-based paint job? Check. Hemp, I repeat: Hemp interior? Check. Solar panels? Check. What the fuck does this car not have that’s thinking about the environment? I got it! An engine that doesn’t run on fossil fuel.

So, regardless of the gasoline powered engine (with or without a fuel efficiency button), this car is stacked  with planet saving gear. To top it all off, it’s 70 pounds lighter than the normal Lotus Elise.  Who cares? It has an interior made of hemp. I want one.

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Let’s face the facts here: you love saving both money and the environment. Whether you trade in your NV200 for a Toyota Prius or keep the heat at 55 degrees in the dead of winter, you get off on the mere fact that at the end of the month you’ll have saved a grand total of $6.34. Congratulations. Al Gore will show up to congratulate you any second now.

So if you’re pushing extremes already, take it up a notch with the Cost Controller, a power strip with built-in electricity monitoring and 8 plugs for your electronics. Unlike other power strips, the Cost Controller will measure how much electricity specific gadgets have used over time, thus allowing you to take appropriate measures to cut costs and save both money and Earth for the low price of $99.99.

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