The CoffinPet concept provides the environmentally-conscious pet with a 100% biodegradable to rest in piece. When it’s time for a pet to lay down their will and power of attorney, they’ll thank you generously for providing such a thoughtful place for their bodies to be dumped and quickly replaced.
Of course, if you keep your pet in shape, you won’t have to worry about owning one of these for a while.
While your puppy might not have actual opposable thumbs fit for walking hand in hand, who’s to say that the canine doesn’t wish they could have contact when they sniff around for their preferred spot to shit. I know that having my Vietnamese house boy hold my hand helps me evacuate my bowels.
The Hand-Shaped Dog Leash allows you to feel a little less impersonal with your dog, adding a fake hand in place of the usual leash handle. Even if you’re totally alone and your dog thinks you smell, you can feel somewhat loved.
Remember when you were young? Days filled with school, pencils and dog anuses? Ahh, the good old days. I remember it like it were yesterday. Wait a second, that’s because it was yesterday! Thanks to these Dog Pencil Sharpeners. With the help of a mighty pet rectum, our pencils are never dull.
The funny this is, we don’t even use pencils! It’s totally for sexual pleasure entertainment value and that old feeling of nostalgia. There’s nothing quite like reliving the days of anally penetrating our pets with sharp writing utensils. Especially when it only costs $14.99. And for you kitty fans, there’s a cat flavor as well. Check it after the jump. (more…)
Paranoid pet owners rejoice! No longer should you fear scenarios such as biblical floods. With this collar you and your dog will be prepared for anything. Remarkably, the collar is illuminated by LEDs around the neck to make finding your pet during the nighttime an ease. This feature is solar-powered, however, so at night it might not even work. Bummer.
More importantly, the collar features a safety function in the form of an integrated humidity sensor that detects moisture and, in the event that your pet is submerged in water, automatically triggers on board CO2 cartridges that turn the collar in to a flotation device. Why rely on Noah and his cruddy ark when we could just equip these collars on two of every animal on our planet?
Despite this woman’s smug look, this could be considered animal cruelty. If it is, it’s perhaps the coolest-looking animal cruelty out there. It would take an impeccable amount of grooming skill to style your dogs hair in order to make it look like a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle. In this case, its Leonardo.
Cleverly dubbed “Leonardoodle,” this poor dog is forced to bend to its master’s will, even if that means looking ridiculous. Hey, I love the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles just as much as the next guy, maybe even more. That doesn’t mean you’ll find me shaving my dog down to the skin to make it look like Splinter.
If you have a pet fish, you understand that they can become pretty boring after a while. They’re nice to look at when you’re in need of some relaxation, but other than that, we’re pretty much slaves to our fish masters, feeding them and cleaning up their shit as they deem fit.
The R2 Fish School Kit is said to be “everything you need to teach your fish tricks.” And by the looks of the above video, you can get your fish to do some pretty cool shit to show off to all of your fellow fish loving friends, including playing soccer, and dodging along various obstacles.
I love dogs just as much as the next guy. Maybe even more so. But this is just getting a tad bit ridiculous. The Doggy Dream Homes provide your pup with comparatively more space than you probably have in your own home.
The Dream Homes are made using the same materials used to construct your home (and superior materials if you happen to live in a cardboard box like myself.) Complete with add-on features such as an outdoor hot tub and satellite or cable television, your dog will be living the high life. It’s to the point where you’d rather live in the dog house. That’s what we’re talking here. (more…)
We don’t think your boss would go for it in your work cubicle, but the Kit In Box is a cute little addition to your home office, as long as you keep the litter box on the other side of your home. Instead of a constant stream of incoming papers to your In Box, your work is replaced by your kitty. This way you can keep a constant eye on your cat, making sure she doesn’t escape.
Frankly, some cats are a real pain in the ass when it comes to working from home. Say your typing an important e-mail, when all of a sudden your cat attacks your mouse and keyboard, either typing a paragraph of nonsense or deleting the e-mail completely. For those moments, we want a Kit Out Box. — Andrew Dobrow
Dogs aren’t called “man’s best friend” for no reason. Most pet owners would put their own life and limb at risk to keep their pet safe. The feeling that your dog is lost somewhere in the wild is one of the scariest thoughts a pet owner can experience. Retrieva is a system which keeps tabs on your dog with a GPS-enabled collar.
The sat-nav collars allows users to sign into a website to pinpoint the location of their dog, whenever the loved pet goes missing. Retrieva uses three different tracking waves; satellite, telecom and radio transmitters. So if you’re out walking your dog and you get pugged, a special panic button notifies your friend that you might be dead. But any good dog that isn’t a little puss should protect you from that in the first place. — Andrew Dobrow
When my pet used to jerk around in his sleep, I always wondered whether pets had the same types of dreams and aspirations as humans. Maybe dreams about space exploration? If our mutt’s dream of astronautical ventures, the only proper thing for us as their human masters to do, is to cater to those needs with the Pet Peek.
The Pet Peek gives your doggy an acrylic plastic bubble, in a very 50’s style sci-fi design, to stick his snout through and explore the unknown of your next door neighbors lawn. For $30, it’s not that much of a price to pay to give your doggy their dream. — Andrew Dobrow
