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Mr. Switch Light Switch Loves When You Flick His Nose

mrswitch

To be perfectly honest, I sort of feel bad for Mr. Switch. He has people constantly tweaking his nose into impossible angles and he’s forced to smile through it all. But we can see through his pain. Those down-turned eyebrows tell us all we need to know about Mr. Switch’s mental state. We half expect lines of grief to form on his plastic forehead.

Though this is great news if you happen to be the type that loves personifying their home. Every fixture must have a personality. Mr. Switch suffers through the pain of a broken nose “switch.” But he’d be caught dead before showing YOU his anguish. If you’re evil enough to put aside the feelings of an innocent light fixture, Mr. Switch would make a cute little addition to your decor.

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FLASH: World War III Imminent

The word just came in over the wire. World War III has begun and it doesn’t involve Iran or Russia. This time, the war is being fought in our own backyards against allergies and smog, with especially hard times for those in Los Angeles. Luckily, our buddies in Korea was able to ship over some NOSK Transparent Nasal Filters for us to use. Rather than look like something out of Ghostbusters with a full-size face mask, we’ll now have the latest in nose-filtering technology at our disposal.

How does it work? Boy, am I glad you asked:

Sported by asthma sufferer Korean Olympian Park Tae?hwan , NOSK, a new 3-layer nasal filter created by Sam Joung International Co. reduces the inhalation of pollutants and allergens by over 80%. You can still talk and eat wearing NOSK, which means it can become a seamless addition to your routine, and unlike masks, your glasses won’t fog each time you breath. Each filter is usable for up to 24 hours so you can just put it on in the morning on the way to work, and toss it in the trash upon arrival home.

Essentially, we can all become supermutants through the power of NOSK. We’ll breathe easier and can even smoke cigarettes while using it. Now that’s what I call multitasking.

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Nose Soap Dispenser Brings Back Nightmares of Mark Summers

I know it’s hard but try to be strong. Ever since you lost that physical challenge on Double Dare, life hasn’t been the same. That trip to Sea World was thisclose. Cheer up, though. Now you can get a DD-esque schnoz that goes in your shower and dispenses shower gel. At $18, it’s a great gag gift and should guarantee hours of fun should you load it up with snot-green shower gel.

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