You’re in London and Mom wants a birthday present. As a gardener, she’s bound to love butterflies. And she cooks a lot too! So I can bet she’s always checking the clock to make sure her famous mocha-chip cookies aren’t burnt. Why not order this lovely butterfly clock from the Design Shop? It’s a bit expensive at $211, but would you put a price tag on your own mother? Didn’t think so. Are you paying cash or credit?

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I know, it’s a little late to be telling you now, but hey, you should get your mother the Momergency Kit for Mother’s Day. It comes with tools for Mom to help keep her sane, and to keep kids busy. Here’s a selection of what it includes followed by a brief explanation on what we think they could be used for:

• A balloon (for strangling herself with)
• Scissors (for gouging out her eyes and slitting her wrists)
• A bandage (for covering the wrist wound)
• Dice (to earn some money in the crack house while you sit and cry)
• Needle and thread (to sew your mouth shut)

There’s more included, but from the looks of it, she’ll only get this far before being arrested. Available now for $25. — Andrew Dobrow
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