Packing in a mind-blowing 8o tools (75 of which you’ll likely never use), the Swiss Army SwissChamp XACT Knife is definitely not a pocket knife. In fact, you’ll be lucky if this thing even fits in your car.
While it features all of the traditional Swiss Army stuff such as a knife, can opener and tweezers, there’s a whole crap load of extra junk, including a ball point pen, a wrench, a chisel and the madness just goes on and on. Grand total? $425.
In this cut-for-cut world, where every average gangster and granny is packing a blade, you’ve gotta defend your own. This Pocket Knife / Ruler combo gadget lets you not only do some serious stabbing, but lets you easily measure your stab wounds on the way to the hospital.
Doctors always love it when you come prepared.
A German prisoner had a score to settle, but he realized there was no way to hide a weapon unless he could devise some sort of evil plan. So, with little other option, the German criminal created a hallowed-out wooden cross with an attached shiv.
Though the plan seemed fool-proof, the German prisoner must have been a world-class fool. His jailers found the blade and confiscated it. Jesus wasn’t available for comment. Photographer Marc Steinmetz shot this and a bunch of other improvised weapons.
If you put enough sharp knives in the Swissarmius Cutlery Holder, you’ll have yourself one hell of a large multi-tool. While it’s not exactly pocket sized, you can cause some real damage with this thing.
No longer just for survival, this kitchen gadget will keep you fully equipped to handle any emergency which might arise in the preparation of an omelette.
Lord knows we could use a tool for saving the contents of our wallets. Though, alas, the Tool Logic Credit Card kit isn’t so much a financial aid as it is a personal survival tool.
Included in the super-compact Tool Logic Credit Card is a full two-inch serrated blade, precision folding scissors, an 8x magnifying lens, a compass, tweezers, a flat screwdriver, a toothpick and a combination awl/can and bottle opener. The whole tool weighs 1.3 oz and fits snugly in your wallet’s credit card holders.
Assisted by your favorite brand of hair spray, these knife combs are unstoppable. The “Comb-At” and “Combmando” combs allow you to whack a dirty, narc cockroach and still maintain your perfectly sculpted hairdo.
Designed by Italian designer Lorenzo Damiani (”Comb-At”) and Thailand’s Studiobo (”Combmando”), the knife combs are made for the stylish hitman. Perfect for the fashion-conscious murdering sociopath who nary has a moment to pause and stare in the mirror. The Combmando can be seen above, hit the jump to check out the Comb-At. (more…)
We all have enemies. That’s why Gearfuse posts a slew of weapons such as the WASP Knife and End Table Defense System. No, we don’t condone violence or the use of weapons for any other reason than self defense, but how can we resist with this $15 dollar concealable pocket knife with a folding blowgun attached to it?
Simply put: we can’t.
You’ll go nowhere with retro gamer belt buckles or a Darth Vader belt, but with a Freddy Krueger glove as your belt buckle, you’ll go straight to hell. Be sure to tell them that Freddy sent ya, if they couldn’t already guess it by glancing at your waist. $40 for a belt buckle might seem steep at first, but this is Freddy we’re talking about it. If you don’t get it, he’ll haunt you in your dreams or some shit. Or maybe, he’ll possess you, making you kill for him, like he did in Nightmare on Elm Street 2. That movie made no sense.
Know what sucks? Getting stung by a wasp. Know what really sucks? Someone stabbing you with the WASP Knife. Sure, getting a blade to the gut can be painful, but with the WASP, you’re also getting a crushing 800 PSI blow to your body. Whether you’re fighting dirty terrorists on dry land or stabbing sharks in the high seas, this knife is going to make sure your target is inflicted with massive damage. And while you can’t make a lamp out of it, it’s still one impressive knife.
Using disposable cartridges of compressed gas, the additional force caused by the WASP will probably rupture internal organs and fracture bone. Supposedly, the knife is for non-civillian use but some scammy website has it on sale for $380. If you’re one ruthless sonofabitch, might as well slap down the Benjamins for some cutthroat action.
The Nihon Uni company, a uniform producer in Chuo Ward, Osaka, has developed a meshy t-shirt that is said to be knife-proof, and could save many from suffering being stabbed or shanked. The strength of the ultrahigh molecular weight polyethylene fiber material used to create this shirt can be compared to the material used in aramid fiber body armor. It certainly beats wearing armor made of CDs.
Conveniently machine-washable, Momma won’t have any trouble cleaning out the blood stains from this shirt, not saying there would be any, because it’s knife proof and everything. Just to point something out, the model wearing the T-shirt must have some seriously diamond grade bio-engineered nips, because those things look just about ready to slice through the fabric, unless it’s an optical illusion or some severe wishful thinking. — Andrew Dobrow
