Gearfuse

How much more awesome would the Revolutionary War have been had it been fought with lightsabers? I think the answer is pretty clear.

Link

Even with the Force at your back it’s hard to stay cool, calm and collected when you’re battling the dark side. Your hands WILL get sweaty and slippage might occur. The Lightsaber Glove holster saves you from embarrassing lightsaber fumbles.

This Lightsaber Glove Holster advertisement is prnted on a t-shirt, so it definitly exists somewhere. T-shirts never lie. Ever. And as you can see, it’s Yoda and Obi Won approved.

Link [via]

When I get out of bed in the morning, I must admit, I’m not feeling the Force as strong as I should be. Hell, some mornings I don’t even feel the Schwartz. I know, I know, I should feel the Force at all times, but without my trusty Jedi robes, I don’t feel much of anything.

The force is always with me… in bed. Wielding my flesh-toned Penissaber, my conquest against the evil Darth Vagina will not cease until penetration is complete.

Link (Thanks Becky!)

To become a true Jedi knight you must be properly trained. Both humans and frogs alike must travel to the swamp planet of Dagobah to seek out Yoda, the legendary Jedi knight.

I don’t know about you, but I don’t have the money to send my pet frog to same fancy pants Jedi school. The best I can afford is this Dagobah Frog Tank. It might not exactly be a trip into the stars, but that’s the best he’s gonna get.

Link [via]

We’ve already seen such classics as Pride and Prejudice and Zombies, and Sense and Sensibility and Sea Monsters. But this is a classic of a whole new sub-genre. The first ever zombie Star Wars novelization, titled Death Troopers by Joe Schreiber, will feature hoardes of zombie Storm Troopers. Something tells me that they will prefer Jedi brains.

I’m way too excited about this.

Link [via]

What’s more important to you? Looking cool or eating sushi that is actually technically sushi? These Lightsaber Chopsticks might cook your sushi, so it might be more of a seared salmon and rice type dish.

These ChopSaver chopsticks are available in red, blue and green colors and are likely to break a few plates over the years. Our advice? Don’t use your finest china unless the force is strong in you or you’re a trained Jedi.

(more…)

Ranking near the top of my “shit I didn’t know i wanted, but now need” list is an awesome Steampunk-style Lightsaber currently being auctioned off on eBay. The metal-constructed saber was constructed by a prop professional, so the quality is likely very high.

With a Buy It Now price of $124.99, the Steampunk Lightsaber is actually really reasonable. Finally, a weapon you can use with your Darth Vader gas mask. Hit the jump for more steamy photos.

(more…)

It’s still burning like a mother, but it’s so worth it. What could be better than Mario and the Jedi mashed together?  It’s like, my childhood in one awesomely sexy package.

What sort of geeky tats have you been looking into?

Saving the planet and Star Wars. What more could a geek want? Other than a Lucy Liu sex-bot, of course. The Jedi were always the ones that came off as the treehugger type. Darth and the rest of the dark side didn’t have much consideration for natural beauty. Perhaps never more evident than when he blows up Princess Leia’s beautiful home planet of Alderaan just because he felt like it.

When will the Galactic Empire learn that nature will always survive, no matter how many Death Stars you build. Are you green Jedi and proud of it? These Green Star Wars Tees from Zazzle are surely right up your alley if you’ve ever been a fan of the Star Wars universe. Admiral Ackbar would be proud.

Link [via]

Torture dogs much? Then you’ll get a kick out of this Darth Vader costume for your canine companion. Despite this dog resembling the likeness of Darth Sidius rather than his apprentice, we approve of dogs dressed up in Star Wars-themed costumes. We only wish there were even more sci-fi costumes available for our pets. Hit the jump to see what I mean.
(more…)