What’s Thanksgiving without a big, juicy turkey as the center piece? Even if you’re planning on eating turkey-flavored tofu crap instead of the real thing, there’s no reason not to feel like you’re at an actual Thanksgiving celebration. The Inflatable Turkey adds a taste of normalcy into your fucked up existence. And that’s all we want. To feel NORMAL!
It even comes in a can, just how Momma used to make it.
“Come on, how can you be crying? They’re pretty much made out of air! Grow up, pussy! So… how was your first day of Kindergarten?”
I’ll feel so much better about beating my kids if I’m wearing these.
Any true nerd would love to receive a working robot to do his/her bidding. Joe-Bot does just that. It’s a three-foot inflatable robot that can be controlled via a wireless remote. Make him turn, make him walk, but don’t ask him to call it a comeback.
It’s your very own robot friend! Standing at over 3 feet tall, this inflatable buddy will fullfill your every robot need, because you can make him do it – by remote control! That’s right, this fabulous “Joe-Bot” can turn 360 degrees and move forward, all at your command. You can even make him say things with the included walkie-talkie. You and your friends will have hours of fun with this little guy.
It’s not as cool as Peter Wang’s robot, but it’ll do.
Paranoid pet owners rejoice! No longer should you fear scenarios such as biblical floods. With this collar you and your dog will be prepared for anything. Remarkably, the collar is illuminated by LEDs around the neck to make finding your pet during the nighttime an ease. This feature is solar-powered, however, so at night it might not even work. Bummer.
More importantly, the collar features a safety function in the form of an integrated humidity sensor that detects moisture and, in the event that your pet is submerged in water, automatically triggers on board CO2 cartridges that turn the collar in to a flotation device. Why rely on Noah and his cruddy ark when we could just equip these collars on two of every animal on our planet?
Mmmmm! Wouldn’t you just love a dollop on your cheesecake?
These festive lights have a real Seussian look to them and can apparently inflate in under 10 seconds. At $240, they’re quite expensive. Considering said lights are available from a French company, you better be multilingual and dedicated to your home if you want to order a few of these.
Are you the proud owner of a backyard pool? Excellent. Invite all the ladies in the neighborhood over and get some grilling done my friend; you’ve got beer pong to play. With the Poolside Pong inflatable table, you can get all the girls into bikinis and dripping with cold beer. It holds the cups in place, it has a spot for your balls and is perfect for fucking in the pool when you claim victory. Get one or at least a decent ripoff, right now.
Here at Gearfuse, we’ve seen loads of stuff that has no practical use in real world applications. Take that toaster scanner thing for example, a neat idea but totally worthless to anyone who isn’t scamming people by selling Mother Teresa-faced toast on eBay. We recently took a look at JooYoun Paek’s website. She’s an artist and interactive designer that takes practical things, doubles them, then combines them creating a whole new worthless product no one will ever use. Don’t believe me? Check out her site to see one of the most absurd motor cycle helmets ever conceived. blah blah blahs lbhsldjf
While we applaud her enthusiasm, her latest design, the self-sustainable chair had us in awe. The idea is similar to those cushions integrated into pajamas, where not being able to find a seat is never a problem. It’s claimed to be a wearable piece of furniture taking on the appearance of a dress or garbage bag, whichever you prefer. The rear-end is inflatable, forming into a chair via pumps in the shoes. Paek hopes it will “transform the humdrum experiences produced by routine walking commutes into an amusing interactive performance.” All it’s really going to do is make you look ridiculous, but being a design from JooYoun Paek, I guess that’s the point.
Editor’s Note: The suit is ridiculous. Watch the video. Read Ryan’s ramblings if you must.
We’ve got a major energy crisis on our hands. We need as many alternatives to fossil-fuels as possible. It’s a good thing some artist spent countless hours on this life-sized inflatable Porsche Carrera. Simply unplug it, sit on the thing and the escaping air will propel you to your destination. So long as your destination is five feet in front of you.
In an effort to increase the cars capable distance, bring a can of Pepsi and a burrito from 7-11 with you while riding in the inflatable Porsche. As soon as you’re finished your “intake” and you’ve released the car’s air, release your own flatulence and the combined forces of your body’s gas and the car deflating will propel you across the state.
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Camping can be a real blast with some buddies and cold brews, but tugging along a boat with you can be a real bitch, especially if you don’t have a trailer hitch on your car. Thankfully, the 21st century has given way to the Backpack Inflatable Pontoon Boat. In under 15 minutes, you can assemble a full pontoon boat for you and your posse to ride downstream.
Weighing only 42 pounds, this sturdily built backpack won’t kill you (if they can do it in the Army, you can sure as hell do it for a vacation.) Each pontoon clocks in at a full 8′ long and can hold up to 350 pounds together. At $237, this is fun you and your friends can afford by giving up beer pong for a week.
