Gearfuse

Your pet eats its emotions. That much is clear. What sort of pet needs to use a Buddha Bed as their sleeping cushion? Pet obesity is serious business. I’d like to talk to you about your fat pet for a moment. Please, avert your pet’s eyes away from the screen for a few moments.

It’s probably not your fault. Who knows? Maybe Fluffy let herself go after that Great Dane left her for a younger (and frankly, hotter) Poodle. I don’t know, I’m not one to judge. But it’s just not a healthy way to live! If you live, or plan on living, in the UK, there happens to be a new gym specifically geared towards your pet’s widening ass. Animal Active plans on conquering the very serious issue of animal obesity before it reaches epidemic levels. By the way, have you heard of Parkour?

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David Butcher is one cool dude. Every day, he exercises for 45-minutes on a pedal-powered generator that powers his laptop computer, a Roomba robotic vacuum cleaner and compact fluorescents. However, he’s not the only one making use of this eco-friendly approach to powering electronic equipment.

A new gym in Portland, Oregon utilizes a similar approach to building up energy.  Personal trainer Adam Boesel opened the Green Microgym not solely to provide members with an excellent workout but also to save some energy.

“It is an example of what a community can do to conserve energy, even if it’s a drop in the bucket.”

If only more people shared a similar outlook on our energy crisis.

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“Staten Island? No problem! Brooklyn? Great! Come the fuck over and exercise before we sink!”

This is the dialogue I would imagine would appear on TV to advertise the River Gym. What’s the River Gym? Oh, allow me to explain. See, it’s a floating boat-type deal with a gym built into it. People work out and not only do they drop pounds, they keep the boat afloat. That’s right. Give me 15 more squats or we’re going to sink, you motherfucker.

So each boat floats in a specific loop around Manhattan and the membership fee is probably ridiculous. For a concept that’s been a work in progress for over three years, I’m curious to see if the River Gym comes to fruition.

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