Look at this fucking thing. What’s the first thing that pops in your head? If you answered “dildo“, you are so correct. Panasonic thinks that consumers want a remote that can rest on a surface like a slug. What kind of market research went into this? Single females 22 to 45? Give me a break.
Late night. Your girl is over. You’ve made it to first base and it’s been wonderful watching Wild Things but now you need to step it up. Grab the gel remote your cousin at Panasonic R&D sent you. Pause the movie right when Denise Richards is getting naked and look your babe right in the eye.
Take the remote, slip it in and you’re an all-star now, kid.
I know it’s hard but try to be strong. Ever since you lost that physical challenge on Double Dare, life hasn’t been the same. That trip to Sea World was thisclose. Cheer up, though. Now you can get a DD-esque schnoz that goes in your shower and dispenses shower gel. At $18, it’s a great gag gift and should guarantee hours of fun should you load it up with snot-green shower gel.
