Gearfuse

In the winter I usually like to grow a full-blown beard, as it helps to keep my face warm and crisp through the harsh snowy season. My skin, on the other hand, has an issue with the hair growth and personally holds me accountable. I’m pretty confidant that I’m allergic to my own hair. I get patches of dry skin wherever I grow in my facial hair — dry skin that remains crusted unless I properly moisturize. It’s actually pretty distressing.

These Mustache Gloves would save me some time and some embarrassment. Not only would my upper lip be warm as I walk around with my finger settled just below my nose, but I’d also get to look like a French aristocrat if I so desired, thanks to the two different mustache options provided by the gloves. They also offer discrete finger sniffing! You can grab a pair on sale for $65, usually $95.

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Maybe Steve, our French-speaking publisher here at Gearfuse could better answer the question, “Why the fuck do French designers always have to do things bass ackwards? Does it make them feel more ‘artsy?’ Do your berets block your eyesight? Too much wine perhaps?’”

The “WTF, Not What I Thought” Lamp, designed by John Nouanesing, surprises the unsuspecting switch-flicker by illuminating the lamp stand rather than emitting a glow from beneath the shade. Very smart, Frenchy. Blind us, why don’t you. I guess that way it’s harder for us to aim our guns at your back as you run away. I’ll be waiting for your answer, Steve.

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The very Frenchly-named Jean-Baptiste Gouraud designed these ingenious Freedombook Facebook business cards. The cards encourage the recipient to “Confirm” (or “Confirmer” if you want to sound pretentious) Gouraud as a business connection, or perhaps as a life partner, if that’s how you roll.

The card holds hall of the pertinent information, including phone number and e-mail address. Let’s just hope that your perspective business partners aren’t so enthralled by your business card that they forget to actually use it how it was meant to be used.

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Melting plastic army men is loads of fun. Real army men, however – well, that’s an entirely different story. Dominic Wilcox either had a troubled childhood, or he was just as normal as the rest of us. After all, melting army men with a magnifying glass is every adolescent’s favorite pass time, right?

He’s taken this fun, yet childish activity and turned it into art by melting the army men together to form a bowl that he’s cleverly named War Bowl. The War Bowl comes in two versions: a blue Battle of Waterloo, Half British Artillery, half French Infantry and the white ‘English Civil War’ War Bowl. While you might not put anything in it, that’s not preventing it from looking awesome.

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Mmmmm! Wouldn’t you just love a dollop on your cheesecake?

These festive lights have a real Seussian look to them and can apparently inflate in under 10 seconds. At $240, they’re quite expensive. Considering said lights are available from a French company, you better be multilingual and dedicated to your home if you want to order a few of these.

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If any of our francophone readers happen to be in France soon, be sure to let us know how your trip was. More specifically, we want to know if French transit company SNCF has expanded it’s trial RFID program. Passengers will receive a USB drive with an RFID chip inside it. You can add money to the account via RFID or hand it to an attendant who will refill it over USB. SNCF wants to have all it’s customers using the system by 2010, so we’ll see what happens. Remember: security always plays a huge part.

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Fancy the electronic duo  Justice? Why not wear tight black pants along with a leather jacket that just screams, “I swallow!” Gaspard Augé and Xavier de Rosnay of Justice have teamed up with French label Surface to Air of Paris to create their own limited edition clothing line, complete with a leather wallet. The line is supposed to reflect their hard “rock and roll” image.

Biker bars or gay bars, no matter where you go everyone will know you listen to music with no lyrics. Who needs lyrics anyways? When you’ve got hot beats and cool sounds, no one is paying any attention to the words.

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