Tag Archives: fat

Want to burn calories while working in your cubicle? You'll have to shell out nearly $5000.

Or a BBBBBBBBBBBBBBBLT as it were. First, apply spread. Second, carefully place two slices of fresh tomato and crisp lettuce. Third, and maybe most important, pour a bowl containing 10 lbs. of perfectly fried bacon on to the sandwich and cover with the other piece of bread. The last step is pretty self-explanatory. I’ll give you a hint. It starts ...

I’m a fatty. It’s a fact that’s impossible to hide. I can wear all the black and vertical stripes I want, the fact of my fatness remains. I’m the Buddha Bag of humans. I think it’s time for a change of heart. Instead of hiding my girth, maybe I should embrace it until I build up the motivation to actually ...

Your pet eats its emotions. That much is clear. What sort of pet needs to use a Buddha Bed as their sleeping cushion? Pet obesity is serious business. I’d like to talk to you about your fat pet for a moment. Please, avert your pet’s eyes away from the screen for a few moments. It’s probably not your fault. Who ...

Ordering pizza from the comfort of your couch while watching your favorite television shows on DVR is now a realization. That is, if you’ve got a TiVo. Now that Netflix has bailed TiVo out, TiVo is getting smart by offering its customers a crucial feature that’ll prevent them from leaving their seat: pizza. A new Domino’s widget is available for ...

Are you an overwhelming fat ass that just can’t shred those pounds because going to the gym is another chore on your list of things you won’t do?� Well, your prayers have been answered! The Vibro Shape slimming belt is said to rid you of your beer-belly in favor of some sexy washboard abs. The belt can also be used ...

Hey, fatty / string bean / muscle man / average weight person or otherwise. Yeah, I’m talking to you. Why must you lie to yourself? You think you’re so healthy, but trust me, there must be something wrong with you. And whatever it is, you bet your ass the Overall Health Balance Scale finds it and taunts you with it. ...

I’ve had girlfriends in the past that have been utterly terrified of the scale. They’d rather be seen wearing this hat in public than know how much they weigh (and god forbid if I were to glance over their shoulder and glimpse a digit or two.) We can only imagine that MiBody would be those ladies’ equivalent of the apocalypse. ...

The touchscreen community has been pretty unsympathetic to the fat fingered crowd. For people with sausage sized digits, pressing one key on a touchscreen keypad is usually accompanied with the pressing of a second button and the escape of a fucking expletive from their lips. The TAD Custom Finger Mod slides a ring on your finger with an attached screen ...

We  really have no idea what the inventor was thinking about, when we’re having image problems we already feel bad enough about ourselves and the last thing we need is a machine to rub it in! Tanita is going to start selling this weight measurer that not only tells you how overweight you are, but also your body fat content, ...