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Pocket Knife / Ruler Combo Allows You Measure Your Stab Wounds

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In this cut-for-cut world, where every average gangster and granny is packing a blade, you’ve gotta defend your own. This Pocket Knife / Ruler combo gadget lets you not only do some serious stabbing, but lets you easily measure your stab wounds on the way to the hospital.

Doctors always love it when you come prepared.

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End Table Defense System For The Warrior Class

For all of the people who aren’t afraid to get their hands dirty, this is the perfect home security option. An end table that breaks down in to a blunt weapon and wooden shield that’s perfect for fending off home invaders or orcs. James McAdam created the Safe Bedside Table in an effort to aid the thousands of people who can’t get to sleep at night without some form of self-defense at hand.

It looks like it’ll pack quite the walloping and it’s a nice piece of furniture to boot. Just hope that intruder isn’t wielding a firearm.

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Wireless Kill Switch For Pace Maker For Future Euthanasia

Kevin Fu, an associate professor at the University of Massachusetts at Amherst, and his team have been working with pacemakers for quite some time. Having reverse engineered a pacemaker, the team found a frightening loop hole. It turns out that a built-in test mechanism for the device includes a bug that can be exploited by hackers.

There is no cryptographic key used to secure the wireless communication between the control device and the pacemaker. This makes it real easy to build your own wireless device that can control the pacemaker. And by “control the pacemaker,” I mean shut it off. Hopefully, this discovery will lead to defense mechanisms put in place that’ll defend those who wear a pacemaker from any remote attack on their heart. Until then, you might want to keep your pacemaker on the DL.

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Umbrella Weapon Keeps Everyone From Questioning Your Authority

You might look like a pussy carrying this umbrella around if it weren’t for the fact that it’s unbreakable. Yes, that’s right. Just like the M. Night Shyamalan movie Unbreakable but without the fear of water.

The umbrella is fully functional like any normal umbrella except for the fact that you could kill a man with it. Bludgeoning someone with this umbrella is easy considering it has the same traumatic effect as a lead pipe. Even after you’re done beating someone into coma (in self-defense, of course), it is guaranteed to still function as a working umbrella.
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