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Expand Your Social Network With Poken

These adorable little devices called Poken are used to exchange social networking info among new found friends who have their own Poken. No one cares to jot down email addresses, user IDs and screen names when they’re in a rush. So, the Poken have been created as a quick way to exchange such information in a matter of seconds. All it takes is a ‘high five’ from your Poken to your new found friend’s Poken. RF technology then sends the info between the devices. The next time you log on to your favorite site, your profiles are linked.

Poken are just $20 dollars and are capable of storing up to 64 contacts before each upload. Each time you add a new contact, your Poken’s hand will light up green. When you approach your limit for contacts, an orange warning light will show from the Poken’s hand, warning you that you’re being too much of a social slut. When all is said and done, you can use your online Poken account to choose which of your profiles you want to share. A precaution in case you want to prevent a shady new friend from accessing personal information. Goodbye business cards, hello Poken!

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Lost Your Cellphone? Backup Pal To The Rescue

If I had a dollar for each time one of my friends lost their cellphone in a drunken stupor, I’d be able to quit blogging and retire in Cabo. Lucky for my compadres, there’s a new device that will back up your mobile phone contacts with the touch of a button. Backup Pal hooks up to your cellphone via USB and downloads everything just by hitting the button. Much easier than starting a Facebook group called “LOST MY PHONE! NEED UR NUMBERZ!!!”

At $50, it’s certainly worth the cash if you’ve lost your cellphone more than once in the past two years.

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Swarovski Contact Lenses Scream Classiness

A new technology has emerged that’s bound to change the way we view trashy women forever. Designed for only the most aristocratic tramps around, the Swarovski contact lens is the most absurd invention of the 21st Century. Imagine a pair of contact lenses with tacky Swarovski crystals embedded in them. Seems like an invention right out of Long Island, right?

Wrong! These were actually designed by a woman in India and have been christened with the name of “Sparkle.”

And to think this shit won second place in some contest. What took first place? The Swarovski-studded lower-back tattoo?

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