Gearfuse

You can’t resist Mario’s balls. Feel the sweetness roll across your tongue. Oh yeah, that makes me so hot. Wait… what?

These awesome Mario truffle balls each feature a different element of the game. And each is om nom-tastic.

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OM NOM!

Made using red velvet raspberry cake, french vanilla cream cheese frosting and a chocolate brain, baking extraordinaire Pamela created these awesome Brain Cupcakes, perfect for zombies who’ve gone vegetarian. The extra little splatter gives it that “just scooped out of the skull” look.

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It’s 10pm. Do you know where your children are?

Chances are they’ve caught on to a strange new trend developed by David Edwards. Dave makes Le Whif breathable chocolate and it’s the new trend that’s shocking parents around the nation. You simply use the inhaler-like device to breath in particles of chocolate. At $4 a pop, this is an expensive habit for your young ones. Let’s see what parents around Long Island, NY think about it:

“Oh my gawd! I’ve got to go through their rooms now!” -Sheila Yablonski

“Chaw-co-lete? Why would kids want to whiff chocolate? It makes no sense. It makes no sense.” -Patricia Lovington

“Where do you buy them? I need to get some for research purposes.” -Roseanne Barr

There you have it folks. Whiffable chocolate is taking over our children and our minds.

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I was much more of a Milky Way fan when I was a kid. Not exactly sure why. These days I’m more of a Reese’s or Snickers guy. Perhaps the geniuses over in the Milky Way advertising department were utilizing my soft child-like brain to bend my consciousness to their will, forcing me to favor their candy bar with their creative marketing ploys.

For real, just look at this caramel-stretching campaign that Milky Way has launched using taxi seat belts. I mean, what the hell? Children can only take so much coercion! Leave my brain alone, Milky Way! More pic love after the jumperoni. (more…)

Here you go. Delicious milk chocolate. Go ahead, take a bite.

HA! I got you good! Quit crying about your broken tooth, pussy. Had you not been such a fat slob for chocolate, you would have taken three seconds to confirm that this is the 4 port USB hub you were trying to borrow. Now you’ve gone and bit it, breaking it into several pieces. Fucking wankers.

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Apparently someone out there is a bigger asshole than I am. They came up with a chocolate company called Fat Pig Chocolates. Each chocolate has some nasty message printed on the wrapper in addition to a picture of a pig snout. Open it up and both the foil and chocolate have the word “Oink!” etched into the surface.

Now, aside from the harsh wording that comes on this pink packaging, there’s also a deeper meaning. Between the blatant “Oink!” on the chocolate, pig mascot and pink packaging, I think it’s safe to assume that this is a cocoa-smuggling ring developed by now-defunct OiNK’s Pink Palace. Hey, those legal fees aren’t going to pay themselves!

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This basic iPhone case is the shit and I’ll explain to you why: You see, it’s modeled after a chocolate bar. And while it’s not real, delicious chocolate, it’s certainly the precursor to a prank that will be played on you constantly.

By purchasing this $30 case, you’re basically begging your friends to offer you a piece of chocolate when you’re piss drunk. You’ll accept the offer and will bite down into the cold metal of the iPhone. You will be disappointed, your iPhone will have teeth marks in it and Willy Wonka will still be a honky-ass bitch.

Of course, the real joke is that your iPhone will be worth ~$100 or less come end of July.

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Hershey chocoholics might want to steer clear of this concept device, as it might make them crave the lusciousness of sweet milk chocolate even more. Each piece of this portable HDD is a modular flash drive, which allows users to chunk their info together to produce one large mega-drive.

The central display is a touchscreen that helps you manage your files and keep tabs on which flash drive is what. If it wasn’t sure to be so expensive, I might even consider eating this device with a tall glass of milk. — Andrew Dobrow

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Hey! OMGZ, guess what! Fans of chocolate and Guitar Hero are going to be, like, uber-excited ROFL. This deliciously chocolaty Guitar Hero cake comes complete with jelly bean buttons and caviar dreams.

Note the whammy bar top being made with a marshmallow. Nice touch! — Andrew Dobrow

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LG is starting to go overboard with their Chocolate line of cellphones. It’s getting to the point where comparisons to the constant flux of Motorola RAZR and KRZR phones need to be drawn. This time, the LG Strawberry Chocolate has been released. Nothing has changed other than the case color and the price. It might be suprising at first to hear that it only costs $100 after a rebate and two-year contract, but then again, look at it. I think a more appropriate name would be the Bubblegum or the CottonCandy, and to make it hip, let’s call it the CotonCandi. –Nik Gomez

Verizon adds LG Strawberry Chocolate [via Electronista]