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Breaking: Madden ’09 Bigger Than Christ

This just in, we’re getting reports that with the release of Madden ’09, Jesus Christ is no longer needed. Teens across the country who once believed that Jesus was the next messiah have been lining up outside Gamestops across the country at midnight and proclaiming that the game is “off the fucking chain, yo.” “I ain’t got no time for God an’ shit” says Anthony Dominguez, 22. “I’m tryin’ to, ya know, buy this motherfucker for the 360 then play... Continue reading