Gearfuse

I’m always sort of embarrassed asking for chopsticks when I’m at a Japanese restaurant. I can almost hear the server’s thoughts: “Stupid fucking Americans, shitting all over our customs.” Though I’d hear something more like “Ayaaaa ching chong hiiiih arigato Mr. Roboto.”

And in a way, we really are shitting all over their customs. And this Chopsticks Plus One and Two concept doesn’t do much to clean our image. Combining chopsticks, a spoon, a sauce bowl and toothpicks (the essential makings of any American dining experience) these chopsticks make eating Japanese food less traditional, but a hell of a lot easier.

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I’ve been on Weight Watchers for about six months now and I’ve found the most difficult part of the diet is accurately measuring out the amount of food I should be eating. It’s not even that I don’t have the proper equipment (which I don’t), but I just don’t have the time. It really does make a dent.

These Measure Up Bowls are absolutely perfect for anyone who is trying to watch their portions and make Weight Watchers a breeze. Measurements are included right inside of the bowl. Such a time saver. Not to mention, less dishes.

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There really is no reason to cry over the Spilt Milk Cereal Bowl. And there’s a good reason why there isn’t. While it might look like a traumatic mess is about to unfold, the bowl is no more likely to cause a mess then any other bowl, unless a child or senior happens to be using it. Because then, you could expect something closer to the result of too much fruit mixed with a nasty case of irritable bowel syndrome. Example? That kid in the photo is clearly two seconds away from pouring that shit all over your brand new shoes. Then it’s time for daddy to knock out the other teeth.

So while it’s designed to resemble an “accident in progress,” you’re much more likely to have an accident in your pants after realizing how amazingly cool this bowl’s design actually is. Perpetual Kid will offer the bowl to the humble public in mid-April for $13.99. Much cheaper than the bowls we are used too, which happen to not be laced with any hallucinogens of any kind. Now would you please put out the fire in your hair, it’s giving the pink elephants stuffy noses.

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Melting plastic army men is loads of fun. Real army men, however – well, that’s an entirely different story. Dominic Wilcox either had a troubled childhood, or he was just as normal as the rest of us. After all, melting army men with a magnifying glass is every adolescent’s favorite pass time, right?

He’s taken this fun, yet childish activity and turned it into art by melting the army men together to form a bowl that he’s cleverly named War Bowl. The War Bowl comes in two versions: a blue Battle of Waterloo, Half British Artillery, half French Infantry and the white ‘English Civil War’ War Bowl. While you might not put anything in it, that’s not preventing it from looking awesome.

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I suppose kids would generally enjoy this more than adults but I sure as hell love the idea that this bowl is running with. The S.O.S. bowl features half of a plane or ship molded to the bottom of the bowl so that when you pour your cereal or soup in, it gives off the illusion of a sinking ship. Pretty clever, eh?

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While you wait for your NES external hard drive to finish transferring porn, you might as well start making a piece to smoke with from an NES controller. Just gouge out the D-pad and fit a bowl in there, man. Connect a little rubber tubing and a mouthpiece and you’re ready to get stoned.

Wait.

Where’d I put my lighter again?

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Are you tired of your Cap’n Crunch cereal getting soggy every morning? If so, the Eatmecrunchy Bowl may be the answer. The bowl features a unique interior shelf that holds the majority of your cereal above the milk until you transfer it to the mixing chamber for eating. It’s a simple design that eliminates one of the biggest problems facing the world today. Available for $8.—Sean Fallon

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Are you constantly dreaming of the time you can go back to the bowling alley and knock down more pins? Didn’t think so. Well if you were, then the Knock-Off Lamp would be a perfect addition to your home or office. Not only is this special lamp serve as a light source, but it also can give you hours of fun because it’s meant to be used like a bowling pin. No, you can’t hit it with a bowling ball, but you can knock it over. In fact, you have to knock it over to turn it off; when the Knock-Off Lamp is on its side, it remains off, but when you stand it up straight, it turns on. Now this is starting to peak your interest, isn’t it? If you are starting to conjure up thoughts of having this in your living room, you’ll jump at the price tag. Knock-Off lamp: $22; Playing with it at work: priceless. — Nick Rice

Knock-Off Lamp [via Spluch]