Although the temptation is so hard to bear, the Bloodbot told me personally that if you’re a good boy, it’ll try not to stab you in your face with its needle.
Bloodbot was made to give nurses more time to read their gossip rag magazines and to swoon over the new hunky residents. Those five minutes of patient interaction was just a bit too hard on their feet. So, if you already have a fear of shots, get ready to add a fear of robots into the mix.
I had “hacked up body” on my Christmas wishlist, but sadly, Santa didn’t deliver last year, which is really lame, because I would have used this $400 ultra-realistic body for Halloween this year.
*sigh* Maybe I’ll get lucky this year. Come on Santa, don’t make me beg.
Tonight, when you sit down for your nightly glass of fresh human blood, please remember to follow the rules of basic vampire hygiene. Nobody likes to walk in to a musky study to find a man with a blood mustache. It just wouldn’t be fair to any visitors.
The Blood Mustache t-shirt illustrates the ugly result of forgetting a napkin as you sip away at your latest kill. Please, for the love of Satan, drink safely and always have a designated slayer.
Vampires need light too. I mean how else would they do their taxes? Read? Cook dinner? These are questions that our vampire community needs readily addressed. My friends, I give you the Liquid Lamp. It looks like a bucket of blood turned upside down, spilled all over your lovely new coffee table. At $200, it’s quite expensive but at least you’ll have an edge come Halloween.
These morbid creations bear a creepy resemblance to that severed horse head plush we wrote about and they’re also more blood-soaked than that Army Of Darkness knit doll. Knit creations become a little more bizarre when carrots are killing rabbits and pink unicorns are out for blood.
Andieman26 posted these on his Flickr account and now I’m questioning his better judgment. Could he be the next Minneapolis Mangler? With knit creations like these, I wouldn’t put it past the guy.
Blood transfusions used to be a silly business involving long waits for donors that required compatible blood types. Thanks to stem cell research, waiting for these donors is no longer necessary. Scientists have used embryonic stem cells to generate blood which could eventually lead to an unlimited supply of type O-negative blood, the most sought after blood for transfusions.
“We literally generated whole tubes in the lab, from scratch,” said Robert Lanza, chief science officer at Advanced Cell Technologies.
Unbelievable, but don’t stop donating blood just yet, Lanza and his colleagues at the Mayo Clinic and University of Illinois devised this method of blood creation but have yet to test it on animals, much less humans.
“At this stage, the work is very promising, but has not progressed to the stage where the cultured cells are fully equivalent” to natural cells, said the organization in a statement. “Much more work will yet be needed before this becomes a practical reality.”
Well, I guess it’s back to the Red Cross donation center for me. With an immunity to AIDS just a gene edit away and a cure for cancer just over the horizon, the future is looking bright for all of mankind.
Not much is known about this red lamp that’s shaped like a huge cupcake diamond. It’s produced by IARF (Interior Adventures For Real) who I assume has quite a sense of humor. For real.
Blood drips, poker and sex. What do these three things have in common?
Answer: A table. It’s called “Paint Or Die But Love Me” and freaks me the fuck out. Just like these make me want to piss my pants in terror.
Trying to fashion your bathroom in a serial killer theme? You’ll need this electronic bloody shower curtain inspired by the famous scene in Alfred Hitchcock’s Psycho. Guests are sure to be startled by the motion-activated Psycho music clip, complete with a screaming woman that’ll make anyone cringe. It’ll go great with those homicidal clothes hangers and no one will ever mess with you once they’ve seen your bathroom.
If that doesn’t scare them, you could always whip out your WASP knife for shits and giggles. It’s a $20 dollar must-buy and runs on three AA batteries.
