This Transformer mash-up toy is built using discarded Thomas the Tank Engine toys. Composed of Thomas and some of his best train friends, Thomas the Transformer is a locomotive Frankenstein monster. Included on this Transformer are Thomas himself, his green friend Percy and the red engine James. This excellent toy sold on the Singapore eBay site for only S$10. Do ...
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Star Wars Computer Sitter Bobble Heads Sit on Your Monitor, Watch You Masturbate
These Star Wars Computer Sitter Bobble Heads are doomed into an existence where most of their time is spent staring down on masturbating geeks. Most of these geeks are likely male in sexual persuasion and it’s probably a fair statement that many are overweight. From the standpoint of a chubby geek blogger who spends plenty of time masturbating to still ...
Read More »Slinky Attempts to Hide As A Light Fixture
The Slinky, being one of the most popular toys of the 20th century, can hardly just walk down any public street like any other run of the mill toy. Poor Slinky would be mobbed by adoring fans. In an attempt to live a half normal life, the Slinky as been forced to disguise itself as a light fixture. See what ...
Read More »Army of Two Action Figures
I didn’t know that the Army of Two franchise was such a huge hit but apparently, it’s enough a cash cow for EA that it’s decided to create some sweet-lookin’ action figures based on the game’s characters. I wish these were around when I was a kid. Look at the detail on these fuckers. Toy maker NECA really knows how ...
Read More »BMW Baby Racer
Your child is the product of two wonderful parents, so why not buy him or her the best toys available? For a paltry $104, you too can have your kid driving around in a toy BMW that has real rubber tires. No fake, plastic Power Wheels bullshit here, folks. This is the real deal, straight outta Munich. Just make sure ...
Read More »Trypticon Transformer Laser Mouse Will Help With Rodent Problems
I’d be scared shitless to leave these Trypticon Transforming Laser Mouse gadgets alone. They could cause some serious damage if they aren’t properly supervised. Think about it. What if they see a tasty real life mouse skitter across your office floor. They are likely to snap their own cable as they pounce. That’s me for ya! Always one step ahead. ...
Read More »Pregnancy Dolls: Great Fun for Pro-Choice, Great Models for Pro-Life
These awesome pregnancy models were designed in 19th century Japan and reappeared in the July 2001 issue of Geijutsu Shincho magazine. The demand for pregnancy toys was must have been overwhelming. Can’t you picture little pro-choice children demanding the chance to perform their own home abortions (Dick Cheney was a child around that time, right?). Fun! Pro-choice kids didn’t get ...
Read More »Dutch Hunt Marijuana Fields With Toys
Guess who has a lot of free time and loves toys? If you said the Dutch government, you’d be correct my friend. These dudes love to build toy helicopters, attach sensors that sniff out cannabis and seek the stuff out in fields around the country. Seriously? You guys need a helicopter to find marijuana? It’s really not all that hard. ...
Read More »Gadget Junkies Will Feel Comfortable In This T-Shirt
While you’re sure to get some strange looks from both sneering fashionistas and mildly frightened parents, you can’t help but enjoy the honesty of this t-shirt. You might not get a confidence boost from acknowledging the fact that you have more toys than a 12-year-old Japanese school girl, but anything else would simply be a lie. If us geeks�are known ...
Read More »Water Flutes: Your Child Is A Dirty Prodigy
The next time your child complains about taking a bath, shove some candy and Water Flutes in their face and they’ll love you forever. For real this time. Water Flutes are just what they sound like. You fill the plastic tubes up with water whilst in the bathtub. Then, you read the included sheet music and learn how to play ...
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