Tag Archives: condom

Condom Mousepad Prevents Googlerrhea

There’s almost no way to tell your computer’s sexual history if you don’t have the money to fork out for a full diagnostics screening. Especially if you happen to purchase it off eBay or refurbished through a company. Sure, they might say it was thoroughly checked. But you never know what might slip though the crack and let me tell ...

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Practice Safe Cuddling: Condom Pillow and Blanket

Face it. Your couch is a dirty, dirty whore. It took literally days for every piece of furniture in your house to mysteriously come down with herpes once your couch entered into the picture. What a hussy. Thankfully, the Lifestyles Condom Pillow and Blanket pair keep you safe from contracting any potential furniture-to-human transmittable diseases. Slip inside the safe enclosure ...

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Finally a Condom That Fits: 0.6 Inches of Pure Man

While I’m shopping for condoms with my fiancee, I put on a strong front. I make sure to announce in a loud voice that we are looking for the Magnum condoms, even though we need nothing of the sort. Shameful, I know, but hey, I’m a man. This 0.6 inch condom was used to promote safe-sex to young people and ...

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Condom Paperclips

Co-worker a huge dick? Get him back this holiday season at the company’s holiday party. These condoms don’t actually contain a rubber but instead have a bunch of paper clips inside. Loudly announce to your co-workers that you think your co-worker left his set of condoms on his desk, flashing the paper clip set around for all to see. He’ll ...

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Design Your Own Jimmy Hat

I’ve always wanted my face printed right on the end of my rubber love glove. Unfortunately, I’ll have to wait until that dream becomes reality. On the other hand, getting a hold of custom FDA approved, lubricated condoms with my face printed on the wrapper is a possible alternative. MyFace Condoms allow you to include your name, picture, a special ...

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Spray On Condoms Won’t Melt In Your Mouth

How is a guy honestly supposed to know that what he’s got packin’ beneath his loin cloth will fit in a Trojan Magnum? There’s no size declared on the box. These companies leave you to trial-and-error until you find the perfect fit. Well that isn’t the case anymore. Scientists from Condom Consultancy in Germany have invented a revolutionary spray on ...

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Contex iCondom Gag Gift About A Year Too Late

Apparently, the iPhone is still fodder for shitty jokes and tasteless products. Case in point: the iCondom. With a box strikingly similar to Apple’s flagship telecommunications device, it’s no humongous 3G iPhone but it’s packed with goodies that are meant to be touched. iMemory, iLight, iTree and iFood are all part of the iCondom package. Allow me to inform you ...

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