You’re running low on cash and you’ve got a date with your lady friend tonight. It happens to losers everyone. You promised you’d wine and dine her with pasta and pinot grigio. A $10 bill is what stands between you and getting laid tonight. The pasta you can cover for under $5, no problem, but the wine is a little harder to cover-up.
The good news is that she’ll be so distracted by your Handlebar Mustache Bottle Opener she’ll hardly notice the label on your cheapskate $4.95 bottle of wine. Apply the corkscrew, position the mustache until it’s properly placed above your lip, prepare for laughter. Or at least that’s the plan. If that doesn’t work, at least you’ll look as sophisticated as Charmander.