Berny Morson Is A Negligent Douche

It doesn’t get much worse than a virtual funeral of a fellow player in World Of Warcraft but that situation has just been one-upped. For some bizarre reason, Rocky Mountain News thought it’d be productive to live blog the funeral today of Marten Kudlis, the 3-year old boy killed at an ice cream store last week.

So, the reporter hopped on Twitter and kept the Internet updated with step by step coverage of the boy’s funeral ceremony. Tragically, the boy was killed last Thursday when Francis Hernandez, an illegal immigrant, crashed into a Baskin Robbins store in Aurora where the boy was waiting to get ice cream. Depressing, almost as depressing as this reporter’s Twitter updates:

RMN_Berny: family members shovel earth into grave
Wednesday, Sep. 10, 11:40 a.m.
RMN_Berny: rabbi calls end to ceremony
Wednesday, Sep. 10, 11:28 a.m.
RMN_Berny: rabbi chanting final prayer in hebrew
Wednesday, Sep. 10, 11:27 a.m.
RMN_Berny: earth being placed on coffin.
Wednesday, Sep. 10, 11:22 a.m.
RMN_Berny: rabbi recites the main hebrew prayer of death
Wednesday, Sep. 10, 11:20 a.m.
RMN_Berny: rabbi zucker praying
Wednesday, Sep. 10, 11:18 a.m.
RMN_Berny: coffin lowered into ground
Wednesday, Sep. 10, 11:18 a.m.
RMN_Berny: people gathering at graveside
Wednesday, Sep. 10, 11:14 a.m.
RMN_Berny: procession begins
Wednesday, Sep. 10, 11:01 a.m.
RMN_Berny: cars queueing up to follow hearse
Wednesday, Sep. 10, 10:59 a.m.
RMN_Berny: pallbearers carry out coffin followed by mourners.
Wednesday, Sep. 10, 10:48 a.m.
RMN_Berny: people again are sobbing. rabbi again asks god to give
marten everlasting life.
Wednesday, Sep. 10, 10:46 a.m.
RMN_Berny: video shows marten blowing out candles on birthday cake,
marten with dog. last images are of headlines.
Wednesday, Sep. 10, 10:44 a.m.
RMN_Berny: video of marten is projected on screen.
Wednesday, Sep. 10, 10:32 a.m.
RMN_Berny: rabbi says marten is close to god now.
Wednesday, Sep. 10, 10:31 a.m.
RMN_Berny: rabbi says marten loved to be tickled. calls the death a
nightmare. no words can sooth us, he says.
Wednesday, Sep. 10, 10:28 a.m.
RMN_Berny: family member says marten is with grandmother who died
last year. � marten we loved you,� he says. People sobbing.
Wednesday, Sep. 10, 10:22 a.m.
RMN_Berny: family member remembers marten.
Wednesday, Sep. 10, 10:20 a.m.
RMN_Berny: rabbi says we will always remember marten and he will live
in our memory.
Wednesday, Sep. 10, 10:18 a.m.
RMN_Berny: rabbi recites 23rd psalm.
Wednesday, Sep. 10, 10:16 a.m.

Seems like a normal funeral to me. Thanks for the update, Berny Morson. Not just for exposing the Internet to your stupidity and carelessness but also exploiting the family in their time of grief. Nice going, douche bag.

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About Mohit


  1. Seriously?! he is a douche.

  2. I worked with Berny Morson for seven years. He is not a douche bag. I’ve been gone for the Rocky for a while now, so I don’t know what transpired. But I am confident it wasn’t his idea. Berny is tough, but he is also sensitive to others. He mostly likely protested this fiasco to his editors before it happened — because he would have rightfully believed that it would have been tasteless, no matter how it was executed. I’m assuming the author of this post denigrated Berny because the author thought Berny was behind this terrible idea. My bet is he wasn’t. So tell me: What would have been Berny’s choice after assiduously protesting this? Quit?

  3. I wonder why this twitter account is still active! I just wrote a nasty letter to Rocky Mountain News.

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