Gearfuse

OK, the first part might be total wishful thinking, but the touchscreen mirror part is definitly on the upcoming wave of the future. The Fraunhofer Institute for Microelectronic Circuits and Systems unveiled their touchscreen mirror system at the Cebit IT trade show this week, and let me tell you, it’s totally going to change the way you brush your teeth and trim your balls.

While the technology behind the mirror’s creation isn’t what you would call “new” or even “new-ish,” the system is still pretty cool sounding. Are you tired of having to remind Grandpa to wash his dentures? That’s the way of the past. In the future, your mirror will remind all of the elders in your life to wipe their own asses and maybe, if we could be so lucky, will guide them through changing their own damn diapers. I mean, really, what could they have possibly eaten?

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While Polaroid film is a dying medium, you can keep the memories going with this mirror that’s shaped like a Polaroid picture. No shaking required; just hold it up and admire how handsome you look, just like this guy. Better yet, take it with you on a date, drop it on the floor to look up your date’s skirt and you’ll have memories that will stay with you forever. Don’t tell them you heard about the idea on Gearfuse though, or they might smash your mirror and you’ll be out $29. No dice.

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This one’s a no brainer. For $10, you can net twenty 4″ x 4″ squares that are one side sticky, one side mirror(y). At 50 cents a pop, that’s not too shabby. Imagine the possibilities with these fuckers too. Throw them on your ceiling above your bed and boom: shitty mirror sex.

Or, if you’re lost at sea, just grab a few and slap them all over your body. As the sun shines, you’ll reflect light and surely draw attention to the rescue chopper circling above. Of course, if all else fails, you can paste them to the wall to spell out “PRINCE” and watch yourself dance around naked to “Purple Rain.”

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Great job. You’ve just killed yourself in a freak cheese grating accident, and now your ghost has no nuts to show for it. Awesome. What to do now? Well, you can always go check your hair in the mirror. Oh, wait! Ghost’s don’t have reflections!

The Ghost Mirror uses some weird magic powers or trick of perspective (one or the other), to give you an early taste of how frustrating it must be to be wandering around in Limbo. The mirror is described as follows: “In this mirror, the observer can see the reflection of his surroundings and yet he is never able to see himself.”

Left to haunt a house for eternity, yet unable to make sure you don’t have a boo-ger hanging. Get it? Boo-ger!

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Whenever I’ve met a celebrity in real life, the most striking thing about them is usually how odd it is to see them in a real-life perspective. We’re so used to seeing them on the big screen, that it’s hard to believe that you can be taller than some of these people.

The Who Tall Are You? Mirror ranks your height along with well-known celebrities, allowing you to see who you’re taller than, and who’s the same height. I, personally, never knew that Kid Rock was only an inch or so shorter than Michael Jordan. I’m probably closer to Ben Stiller’s height. Thankfully, I’m a lot more entertaining, and totally sexier. — Andrew Dobrow

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Do you have a misconceived self-image?When I use my mirror to elegantly dishevel my hair  just how I like it, I sometimes need to have my Vietnamese slave hold another mirror behind me at an angle just so I can see the view from the back. The 360 Degree Mirror is made to allow you to ogle my your flawless physique from all angles simultaneously, to assure you look great for the cameras.

The center panel illuminates to cast a glow on your profile, while three panels on each side are designed to wrap around for a complete 360 look. If you don’t feel like seeing yourself in panorama mode, just fold the side panels together. Get yours for $40. — Andrew Dobrow

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Some people rely on what’s in their wallet to determine their self-worth, while many still think their own reflection is the one thing holding them back. Maybe if my nose was just a little smaller I’d get that job. The Tetris Mirror mixes gaming goodness with self-image in an ultimate testament to retro bit design.

Using thirteen interlocking mirrored acrylic panels which can be mixed and matched any way you want, or just in a traditional rectangle, the Tetris Mirror will either improve your geek factor to a degree cooler than ice, or skew your personal self-worth so much that you’ll go from geek-chic to nerdy in seconds flat. — Andrew Dobrow

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Celebrities who are followed by the paparazzi know best. You can’t always look your greatest when someone takes a candid snapshot of you and then darts away. The Snapshot Mirror at least gives you a little heads up on what you might look like if you were to be photographed.

Resembling a typical Polaroid-style picture, the framing of the mirror lets you admire your facial physique even when you don’t have a camera handy. You can pick up your own for $14. No refund if the mirror cracks when you take a look in the morning. — Andrew Dobrow

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When me and my Vietnamese house boy take our weekly shower together (if he’s not too sore from his daily flogging), things can get pretty hot and steamy. The only problem with that is afterwards, I like to marvel at my adonis-like physique, which is pretty difficult when the mirror is fogged over.

This Windshield Wiper Mirror is a cool way to make sure my mirror is no longer fogged with steam. Meaning more time to admire. Jackpot.  — Andrew Dobrow

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