Look at this fucking thing. What’s the first thing that pops in your head? If you answered “dildo“, you are so correct. Panasonic thinks that consumers want a remote that can rest on a surface like a slug. What kind of market research went into this? Single females 22 to 45? Give me a break.
Ladies! Do you love to munch rug? Find pleasure in shoving a cucumber in your vagina or anus? Excellent. Pay attention.
After awhile, you’ll most likely have built up an impressive collection of sex toys that rivals that of Star Jones’. Do yourself, your husband and the environment a favor and dispose of these toys properly. Instead of throwing it out and leaving it for Ted the Garbageman to find, use this official Sex Toy Recycling Program. Send ‘em a box of dildos and you’ll get a $10 credit towards a new one from their online store. Not a bad deal, right? This company will even clean and dismantle your vibrators and dildos to ensure they’re disposed of properly.
Late night. Your girl is over. You’ve made it to first base and it’s been wonderful watching Wild Things but now you need to step it up. Grab the gel remote your cousin at Panasonic R&D sent you. Pause the movie right when Denise Richards is getting naked and look your babe right in the eye.
Take the remote, slip it in and you’re an all-star now, kid.
Check out this USB “hand warmer” stick. It doesn’t have the finger grips that the other USB hand warmer has, but it costs a dollar more. Strange.
Oh, who am I kidding. This thing is as much for your hands as a monitor is for your head. In truth, this is a covert dildo for pleasuring either yourself, a loved one or maybe even a one night stand. The fact of the matter is, you never know when a heated dildo will come in handy.
C’mon, this isn’t exactly a beanbag-looking hand warmer. This is a stick. Not just any regular stick, either. It’s curiously shaped to fit every orifice of the human body. It’s great for vagina, too. I don’t know about you, but a $12 dollar heated dildo is as cheap as they come. I would know – I own two.
So, we’re at the Last HOPE Conference in New York. The moment we arrived at the Pennsylvania Hotel, we took the escalator upstairs to the showroom floor. We were then greeted by this blossoming solar powered dildo flower thing. Whew, that’s a mouthful, and so are all those dildos!
Glass or rubber, these lamps have it all. Dildos, butt plugs, anal beads and pretty much any love stick imaginable decorate the light, but perhaps most importantly is the center piece. Surrounded by your typical dildos is the eye popping mega-butt plug. I’d love to meet the girl daring enough to join forces with it.
A combination of steel, LEDs, solar electronics and a sick mind are all Randy Polumbo needed to craft these perverted lamps which are ideal for any bachelor pad. Invite a bunch of your lady friends over and see how many of them can sit on it simultaneously. It’d be like king of the mountain, except more erotic. If you like his work, hit the jump below for more pics and his website.
