This is what I imagine would happen if your Goldfish died from obesity and got stuck as you tried to flush it town the shower drain, stuck because of its massive girth. Stuck like Winnie the Pooh’s fat ass in his window. Stuck like my junk in a beer bottle. Don’t ask, please.
And let me just assure. This is much more comfortable to use than the fishy butt plug. At least that’s what I hear. *wink* *wink*
Playing God is entertaining. If it wasn’t, games such as The Sims and the iPhone’s Pocket God wouldn’t be nearly as popular as they are. So why shouldn’t gadgets offering a bird’s eye view of another person’s misfortune not be popular as well?
The Falling Books Bookend adds a dose of omnipresence into your study or library. Watch as a little unidentified man perpetually raises his arms in fear of the oncoming avalanche of knowledge.
This reminds me of the calm serial killer, who after viciously murdering a family, sits down for a refreshing cup of tea. The Blood-Splattered Coffee Set is very Bates Motel-ish.
While it seems like a must for those of you into the seedier side of horror, the price tag is steep. You’ll have to shell out $500 for this 15-piece porcelain tea set.
Nothing shows your coffee beans who’s boss quite like a power drill made to grind them into oblivion. This modded power tool was created using the burr of a peppermill.
I happen to love a little metallic zest in my brew.
Even people with above-average organization skills sometimes have a rough time keeping track of full batteries. Somewhere in your house, you likely have a junk drawer. And in that junk drawer is doubtless no less than 10 batteries of varied remaining energy levels.
The Battery Collector is an all-in-one solution to battery organization and level testing. Shelf slots offering a variety of battery sizes act as your AAs new home. A battery meter on top of the organizer allows you to test the batteries remaining energy levels. So much more effective than sticking the battery on your tongue and hoping for a tingle.
We can only imagine the incredible leaps and bounds which will be made in the chair business by the time that “the future” rolls around. But if we had a choice of what the future chair would look like, the Transfoarmchair would seem like a safe bet, as long as the future really turned out to be like a science-fiction novel.
The three-dimensional interactive Transfoarmchair alters its wire mesh shape by monitoring electronic fields with a super-intuitive self-serving alloy. Special electro-chrome polymers allow the chair to change its color on your command. But hey, as long as it has a cup holder, I’ll be content.
There have been countless methods of recycling your old, abandoned, bong water-stained vinyl, but none that have integrated the actual casing and cover art as well. If you have such epic records as Led Zeppelin’s IV, there is no reason NOT to show them off some how.
BUGHOUSE designed this unique record table, which would fit spectacularly into your den of devil worship. It’s much more thoughtful than simply throwing them in the trash bin, surely.
Do you feel like simultaneously learning naval war strategy and getting shit-faced? Enigma, the Battleship Drinking Game, designed by Mauricio Harion is the sure fire way to hone your Battleship skills, while competing to save as many brain cells as possible.
Instead of “ships” your opponent tries to blast away your shot glasses, which you must drink. Whoever is still standing by the end wins. At least, that’s my guess.
As long as you don’t mind dozens of eyes watching you shower, this Emoticon Shower Curtain is a hell of a way to geek up your bathroom a bit. Emoticons are becoming a new language all their own. Might as well brush up on your grammatical skills while you wash your balls nuts testicles hair.
Sorry to send you to Bed, Bath, and Beyond, which is admittedly, pretty lame, but that’s where you shall find this awesome curtain. And for $15.
OK, look, I know I was just saying how much of a futuristic geek I am, but it seems I’m more stuck in my retro roots than I originally thought. All the proof I needed was the boner I got when I saw these awesome Asteroids Wall Decals. I remember first jamming out to Asteroids on a vintage Atari 2600 (a little before my time, so it was indeed a legacy machine). What can I say, it was love.
Anyway, these wall decals would look bangin’ in my home office. I know interior design is supposed to be the hobby of woman and womanly men, but count me in if we’ll be playing with decals like this. Grab your own “Space Rocks” decal set for $44.95.
