And I thought I wanted to have sex with my iPhone before this existed. The iPhone Corset dresses your Apple device in a naughty piece of nighty-wear, revealing just enough to tease the hell out of us while maintaining its womanly figure.

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Not quite completely fingerless, but just enough so that you can access your touch screen phone, the Etre Touchy Gloves keep your hands as warm as possible, covering all of your fingers except the thumb and forefinger. Sure, it might be mustache-free, but that’s the price you have to pay.

With only two fingers missing warmth, you might look a little silly, but the utility of not having to remove your gloves, and not being pushed away from wearing gloves in the first place, is so worth it. The winter chill is harsh, but so is not having any access to my iPhone. At least I can save my other three fingers from frostbite.

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Imagine this. Let’s just say your name happens to be, oh, I don’t know, Fred Savage, and your grandfather happens to be a book obsessed Peter Falk impersonator. Say he walks into your bedroom one day when you’re coughing your ass off, I mean hacking up a fuckin’ lung, and he starts rambling about some six-fingered man and a rhyming giant. I know, you’d think to yourself, great, Grandpa has finally lost it and there’s nothing I can do about it. He’s probably going to murder me in my sleep and mom won’t care because she loves her batshit crazy father. Awesome.

But instead of murdering you, maybe Grandpa Pete just wants to gift upon you a miraculous piece of Princess Bride gadgetry. The Inigo Montoya Nametag iPhone case allows you to feel as though you too need to take revenge against the six-fingered man. Damn him and his extra limb of evil. Damn him to hell. But first, let’s make sure our iPhone doesn’t get scuffed up in the impending battle, shall we, hmmm?

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What are babies known for? Mainly pooping and screaming. That’s just the nature of the early human life. And who can blame them? The only problem is that the screaming is almost impossible to decipher through the human year. To us, it’s all just screaming. But apparently there are at least five different types of cries and the Cry Translator iPhone app claims it can distinguish between them all.

The Cry Translator helps decode the mysterious yiping of your newborn, dividing the scream’s cause into one of five basic categories: hungry, sleepy, annoyed, stressed, bored. It might be hard to believe, but the app claims it can “reduce overall infant crying.” And for $9.99, that’s a little piece of heaven for new parents.

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So you’ve lost your car… again. How many times have you forgotten where you parked? It happens to the best of us, but everyday? Come on, you should probably go visit a neurologist or something.

If he has trouble squeezing you in, here’s a nice back-up plan. The $.99 iPhone app Car Finder uses augmented reality to help you find your car. Car Finder guides you to your car using easy to follow walking instructions and even marks your spot with a little icon. Now all you have to do is remember to actually set the app before you leave your car.

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It’s barely been a year since the App Store opened its metaphorical doors and yet developers have not ceased to continue their plot to create an app for every damn problem or non-problem you might or might not be facing. 100,000 apps later and here we are. We have apps to help you look up Asian girls’ skirts, apps to help you get jailbait porn and of course about half of these apps are some sort of variation of a farting sound machine.

While the app creation process has certainly slowed down from its fervent beginnings, hundreds of apps are still released every single day. The App Store has become a pretty incredible result of what innovation can achieve if done right.

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So you think you’re real smooth jailbreaking your iPhone, huh? Really pulled the wool over the eyes of Apple, you did. Dutch jailbreakers beware. A hacker from the Netherlands was recently able to conive a series of Dutch iPhone users into using his software to “jailbreak” their device. When the supposed jailbreak is complete and the phone is rebooted, users receive this message: “Important Warning: You iPhone’s been hacked because it’s really insecure! Please visit doiop.com/iHacked and secure your iPhone right now! Right now, I can access all your files. This message won’t disappear until your iPhone’s secure.” Riiiiiiight. D’oh!

Users are asked to deposit $5 into a PayPal account in return for a promised solution for unhacking the device, most likely just a factory reset of the phone. This is a warning to all you jailbreakers out there. Shit can happen. Be safe. The Force is with you.

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Here’s a cheap way to create your very own sleek iPhone stand using an old Mini DV case. Creator Elam Nikserof added a coat of satin enamel paint and cut out a notch out of the case so he could still access the iPhone’s home button.

After hours of furious sanding, Nikersof was finally satisfied with the smooth finish, which looks about as soft as silk sheets.

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Augmented reality… it doesn’t come cheap, unless you have invention and ingenuity on your side. This crafty cheapskate created his own Augmented Reality Goggles using nothing more than some cardboard and his HTC Magic smartphone, plus a little extra hacking of the Magic’s compass feature and Google Street View.

Hit the jump for a video demo.

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There is surely a large percentage of you who have been holding out on the iPhone not out of spite, but because you just don’t have the extra cash laying around. In these times of financial strife, sacrifice is essential. If you still want to at least LOOK like you can afford an iPhone, iPhoneDummy.net is selling non-working display models for only $20.

So while you won’t be surfing the App Store anytime soon, you can still appear to be part of the crowd. And isn’t that what really matters?

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