Borrowing elements from both Van Gogh’s Starry Night and Monet’s lilies, I don’t know what would be more proper for this Impressionist Cake, eating it or hanging it on the wall.
Whatever you might do with it, one thing’s for sure. Even though the cake steals elements from other well-known paintings, it takes a real artistic eye to paint, with frosting I might add, such an accurate portrayal. This is a piece of art all by itself.
These Mini Lighter Cufflinks were available on Etsy before the internet took over and sold out every last pair. Will they be back? Who knows, but lord, these things are awesome.
They’re cufflinks which are actual lighters, meaning you can light up a smoke without even reaching into your pocket. I wouldn’t recommend these if you go a little heavy on the cologne. That could end pretty messy and likely extra crispy.
If you’re unfortunate enough to have a waitress who is having a bad night, don’t give her any shit. You never know if she’ll do something devastating, like dipping your hamburger bun in her menstruation blood (extra ketchup, sir?) or even (gasp!) bringing you decaf instead of regular.
We can’t help you too much with that first one other than to advise you to bring a barf bag, but as for something as important as your coffee, there are D+Caf strips, which allow you to test your coffee to see if your waitress brought you what you asked for. A set of 20 costs $9.95. So, that’s with two cups a sitting, that’s at least 10 safe sittings.
Many are familiar with this essential pair. What would the morning be without a cigarette and a strong cup of hot joe? Miserable is what it would be. Mixing your love for coffee, carcinogens, and saving the Earth, this Coffee Ashtray is a green alternative to the material of your other ashtrays, made with compressed coffee grounds.
Just as long as you know that no matter what ashtray you use, you’re still going to die, slowly and painfully. Have a great day!
They say that elephants never forget. But who cares about memory if you have to be terrified by mice all of the time. Is that any life worth living?! Huh? HUH? ANSWER ME!
The “Pachydermos” steampunk-inspired gas mask is either made for elephants or made to make you look like an elephant. Either way, the steampunk design is pretty badass. The big circular ear is an awesome addition.
There is no escaping the majesty of bacon. Hey, we’re not complaining. This is a case of integration. Mashing the munchies into the dooby.
These Bacon-Flavored Rolling Papers are available individually or in a box of 36. Single packs are $1.95, while the bulk pack will set you back $30. Bacon is a novelty that will never get old.
It’s no wonder Dr. Evil wanted sharks with fricken’ laser beams attached to their heads. Just check out what a laser can do given the right project and tools, even on a tight budget. This step-by-step video tutorial teaches you how to turn a Bic lighter into a flame shooter which ignites shit using a laser beam.
Light a fuse, ignite a cigar, brand your children. The world is yours! Video after the jump.
If you can’t go very long without a smoke pressed between your lips and your cell pressed to your ear, you might need a way to join the two mediums. Sure, we’ve seen the device which swears to be the ultimate smoker’s phone, but where is the lighter?
The SB6309 Cigarette Lighter Phone includes a lighter in its ingeniously deadly design. Slip the protective cover back and flick the lighter button. Soon enough, you be flaming mon.
This is actually a really decent playlist.
So, this is not an “official” list or anything. Which I guess makes it “unofficial.” But the extensive detail of the list, including playable musicians, leads me to believe that the detailed track list for Guitar Hero 5 will look something like the following:
All of the fun of cigars, without the smell! This helpful step-by-step DIY allows you to create your very own USB Cigar Flash Drive. A perfect gift for expecting fathers and dudes who like smoking cigars after successfully fending off an alien invasion.
The drive glows orange like the hot embers of the finest stogies. When you delve into disk access, the glow gets even brighter, much like a cigar in the process of being inhaled.
